This is actually a Self-Pity Post about feeling old and a little pathetic. I'm going to get very Share-y right now, and I need your support.
Here goes.
I have a little crush on
Myles Garrett of the Cleveland Browns football team. I find him very attractive; moreover, he likes Elton John music, writes poetry, and studies dinosaurs. Look how cute he is.
Additionally (oh, it only gets worse!) I have a continuing Thing for
Timothée Chalamet and his perfectly sculpted chin and cheekbones. I know absolutely nothing about him except that I think he should use the French pronunciation of his first name, not the American (even though it would sound sort of sing-songy, so I guess I get why he doesn't). I don't even watch his movies. I just find his whole head incredibly beautiful.
Both of these men are only 27 years old. I am old enough to be their...(where is Mikey to do my math!?) ... well, certainly their mother. Could I be their grandmother as well? Give me a moment--no Mikey.
-*-*-*-*-*-*
Holy crap, yes. Yes, I could be. If their mothers were only 18 when they had Timothée and Myles, they would be 45 now. That means I'd have been 19 when I had them. It's a bit of a stretch, but certainly possible.
Sigh. It's just pathetic. And a little creepy. But here's the thing. The man I used to have a Major Crush on now looks like this
That is what is left of Daniel Day-Lewis. For your reference, here is what he used to look like when
Yeah, I could be their granny too...and I did NOT need to see that current picture of DD-L! thank you NOT. Now, when I was in early high school or late middle school, I had a crush on Tom Jones - yes - THAT singer. Have you seen him recently? OMG Horrors!!
ReplyDeleteVera--But do you have a crush on a pretty young thing now? Having a crush on someone long ago isn't forbidden fruit.
DeleteAnd, dear, Tom Jones is 83! Give him a little break.
I used to have a crush on Daniel Day-Lewis too as well as Tom Jones but my eye-candy crushes now are young enough to be my grandsons.
ReplyDeleteJean--Who are your eye-candy crushes now? That's what I want to know.
DeleteThis is the funniest post I think you've ever written, and I died laughing at some of the banana price or mislabeled produce ones. Just saying.
ReplyDeleteStop it. Charlamet? Well, I have to agree. He is super cute. I was gonna say that I don't have any weird crushes, but now that I'm thinking of it - the quarterback of Notre Dame's football team, Sam Hartman, is divine. He's really, REALLY hot. I've always had a thing for Hugh Grant. I don't care how old he is. I will always enjoy him. Daniel Day Lewis - "what is left of him." Stop it. But you do have a point.
Ernie--I'm so glad you got a good laugh at this post. I know you need one at this point in your life.
DeleteI just googled Sam Hartman and WOW. You're not kidding. He is extremely goodlooking. I'm adding him to my list with absolutely no shame, and THANK YOU.
Hugh Grant was cute, but he was, as my friend Carrie pointed out, "too twitchy and blinky." She made me notice it, and then I couldn't STOP noticing it. You're welcome.
Two words ----- Justin Hayward.
ReplyDeleteBut, can we address the elephant in the room? If a woman of a certain age goes out looking like a man of a certain age, the media would rip her to SHREDS!
Dee--Justin Hayward is hardly forbidden fruit at age 77. I want to know if you have a crush on a much younger man.
DeleteAs far as the elephant in the room comment, do you mean that an older woman couldn't get away with looking like DD-L did in public? If so, then I agree. Wholeheartedly.
$2.99? Along with your $15 haircut? Sigh. Your gas probably isn't $5.39 a gallon either. And I'll bet you could buy a smallish 3 bedroom ranch home for less than a million dollars. California sucks. Then again, I live in an expensive part of California. I bought a pint of blueberries for only $6.99 yesterday, and boy, that was a relief. Now I'm just bitter. I think I need to move. Sorry about your lake house, you just got tenants.
ReplyDeleteI used to get my hair cut at a beauty school to save money, and had just about gotten used to the student-hairdressers being in the same age group as my daughter, but one of them had a GRANDMA that was my age. I was in my early 50s at the time, so those were some YOUNG MOMS, but still.
I always feel really creepy when I notice that a man young enough to be my son is really cute.
J--I will say that blueberries came down to that since two weeks ago when they were about $4.00. And no, I paid $2.95 a gallon for gas here about a week or so ago. I just googled a few ranch home in desirable neighborhoods near here, and they range from $200K-750K depending upon where you want to be. My brother just bought a one-story home with full basement apartment, 3 bedrooms, lots of nice finishes--$350K. Ohio is cheap, but we have the bad Politics.
DeleteIt IS creepy to find younger men attractive, but I look at it this way: I also appreciate art and film. And nature. I find beauty in lots of things. These men are like that. I'm not fantasizing about them or stalking them or any of that. I just think they're nice to look at.
I'm happy to say that I paid $4.99 for blueberries today, so they are coming down. We sold my Grandma's 3 bedroom house in 2021 for $415K, which is a lot cheaper than it would be here. If it hadn't been 30 years out of date and with some serious issues, we could probably have gotten $450K, but it's about 70 miles from here. Here there is a 1 bedroom, 750 square foot condo in a 40 year old building for sale for $450K. It's crazy.
DeleteI'm with you on the handsome guys. They are certainly nice to look at. It reminds me of when my dad had a crush on Jennifer Lawrence. He didn't fantasize about her, I don't think, he just thought she was nice to look at.
I'm not much of a tv show or movie watcher, so most of my crushes are baseball or hockey players. Hmmm. Where shall I start? I used to love Dansby Swanson & then he abandoned the Braves for the Cubs. I think Jordan Martinook (hockey) is adorable. I apparently have a thing for scruffy men? (Note: See my husband.)
ReplyDeleteBug--You may have both of these young men. They are not pretty enough for me. I love your team loyalty that makes you abandon your crush once they abandon your team.
DeleteMy daughter is 8 years older than her boyfriend and I was shocked when I realized I am the same age as his grandparents! Yikes! But they are happy and I am old so I just have to get over it.
ReplyDeleteI don't think DD-L looks bad at all.
Ellen--It's tough when The Truth hits you in the face like that. Bravo for your daughter and her boyfriend for dismissing their age difference.
DeleteWe will have to agree to disagree about DD-L's appearance. That's all I can say.
What about your forbidden fruit? No crush on anyone indecently younger than you?
YES. Myles Garrett all the way. That SMILE.
ReplyDeleteSuzanne--Myles Garrett's smile is the perfect mix of shy and complete joy. He has that boyish charm. I don't even care about his muscles.
DeleteNever mind the face - how does the body look in nicely softened jeans, clinging in all the right places. Um. Having said that - I don't much watch TV and never sports, and so I don't have modern favs. Back in the day, Lewis, yes. Denzel Washington, very much yes. Val Kilmer (not so good lately, oh dear), etc. I have to say that both the post and the comments have made my day.
ReplyDeleteMary--I am All About The Face, not that I don't appreciate a good physique as well. It's just that I don't need abs, a certain kind of derriere, muscles, etc. I am all about a chiseled face, an almost pretty look. I also had a thing for Rob Lowe early on, and he's got the same look. Orlando Bloom, too.
DeleteMy, yes, the comments are fun, aren't they?
Come to think of it, I guess I am both crepey and creepy.
ReplyDeleteMary--LOL Good one!
DeleteI don't know this Myles Garrett, but he IS adorable. I would invite him over to dinner.
ReplyDeleteNGS--He is too cute, right? Now come on and confess--who is your young crush?
DeleteI LOVED this post! I did not realize Timothée was all of 27! He does look younger, right?! My secret crush is the band Young the Giant--I couldn't pick any members out in a lineup, but I do feel like all their songs are written and sung particularly to me.
ReplyDeletemaya--Thanks. I do think TChalamet looks younger than 27. It's silly, but I actually felt a little less awful when I saw his age. LOL! I'm off to listen to some Young the Giant--they're new to me.
DeleteI don't know either of your child crushes, but damn, I'd kill for Timotheeeeeeee's amazing hair.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to recollect if I ever saw a Daniel Day Lewis movie. Maybe?
Do I have a celebrity crush? Hmmm....it used to be Dave Matthews, but I'm kind of over him now. Not sure why, but we're the same age anyway and that's no fun.
A few girlfriends and I were giggling last week about how cute Kevin Costner is, but I think he's older than me. Let me check. HELL, he's 68! 😜
Surely I have a young crush, but I can't think of one now and that makes me feel really old.
BB Suz--No, it's no fun at all if your crush is the same age or older. Not very Forbidden.
DeleteDD-L made a lot of artsy and highbrow movies except for The Last of the Mohicans. That's the one I first met him in. That started my long affair until he simply refused to look beautiful after awhile. Art and Talent can only go so far, you know.
I heard Kevin Costner is kind of a shit. You're better off without him. ;-)