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Thursday, August 07, 2008

In The End, It's All Politics--But The Politics Never Ends


Like the Obama campaign, I have been trying to calculate when to release this post so that it gets as much attention as possible and gives me the maximum bounce in the polls and is not overshadowed by the 2008 Olympics Live from Beijing. You know...8-8-08 and all that crap.

There is, quite possibly, only one thing that I am sicker of in the news these days than The 2008 Olympics Live from Beijing (8-8-08), and that is Brett Favre. So, let me just say this: Brett Favre is just a football player. He did not discover a cure for AIDS or cancer. He did not build low-income housing for the poor, nor is he rescuing millions of people in danger in Darfur. He did not biologically engineer a new species of drought-resistant grain to feed the starving, nor did he build a fuel cell that will allow my car to run on water. He is a snarky prima donna who has decided that he can't live without his little sport and wants to return to it and is astonished that people moved on without him. SO! PEOPLE! MOVE ON!

Moving on.

(Note to general media and ESPN--see how I did that?)

I will say one little thing, however, about The 2008 Olympics Live from Beijing (8-8-08), and this it is: the government there has the right idea. They have published and distributed to their citizenry a little booklet that instructs them all in the finer points of acceptable dress and behavior. I am certainly on board with that. This is exactly what we in the United States need Government for. It is painfully obvious by a cursory glance in any public venue that Most People are simply unable to do this themselves.

This booklet in China was written by--get this title--the deputy director of the Office of Capital Spiritual Civilisation Construction Commission. Holy crap! It contains these fashion admonitions:
*don't wear your pajamas in public
*don't wear white socks with black shoes
*don't wear more than three colors in your outfit

It also contains these behavior rules:
*no spitting
*stand with feet slightly apart or in the shape of a V or Y when standing
*no public displays of affection
*handshakes should last no longer than three seconds

As you may recall, I have offered to make the Department of Nance a bona fide Government Office and take it upon myself to be the Authority about such things as these. I wouldn't even expect a bigass title like the Chinese guy up there. (Although, wow. That's way impressive.) I also find the Chinese rules to be reasonable and would echo them in my own booklet. But, how do you get your feet in the shape of a Y? Hmmm....

I would probably add a few, as you can guess:
*no Crocs or flip-flops at all; you cannot control yourselves
*no miniskirts or belly shirts if you are over 25
*no sweatpants in restaurants, ever
*no visible underthings of any kind ever on anyone
*no talking on your cellphone at a cash register
*no talking on your cellphone in the restroom
*no children under 17 in any movies rated R whether an "adult" is present or not
*no food or drink allowed inside a live concert or play or musical venue during the performance

That's just a preview, plus my arm hurts. A LOT.

Finally, let me say this--I live in Ohio, also known as The Swing State to Rival All Swing States. We are bombarded with television ads from both candidates on the half-hour. And I have to tell you that I find the McSame ads so incredibly offensive, so obviously mudslinging and defamatory that I cannot even begin to tell you how angry they make me. The one where he actually asks the question "And who is to blame for high gasoline prices?" and then shows a picture of President-Elect Obama and plays a track of a crowd chanting Obama's name makes me ill and is so patently absurd that I cannot believe it is still running. It's even been mocked by members of his own party. And do NOT get me started on the "Celebrity Ad" where he compares President-Elect Obama to Britney and Paris. And his comment to a questioner at one of his "events" was that this ad was him "just having a little fun." He reminds me of the odd, slightly creepy uncle who likes to tickle kids until they beg him to stop, but he doesn't; they start to cry and then he says, "Oh, come on! We're just having a little fun!"


As a teacher, here are a few reasons I'll be voting AGAINST McSame:

*he supports a plan that would base my salary on students' test scores. That's like your dentist being judged by how well you brush or floss at home. Who controls parenting/the home environment/nutrition/access to materials? (AP 7/8/08)
*he wants people to buy their own health insurance on their own rather than get it from their employers. He proposes a new tax on people who do get health care from their employers. (CNN 4/29/08)
*he voted against 5 billion dollars in public school funding while voting for 70 billion dollars in tax cuts for millionaires. (vote #269, 10/26/05; vote #83, 3/21/07)
*he supports No Child Left Behind, but voted to kill efforts to fully fund it. This single piece of legislation is hamstringing our schools and teachers and, ultimately, our kids. (CNN 11/3/05; AP 4/13/07; H.Con.Res.95, vote #114, 4/28/05; S.Con.Res.18, vote #68, 3/17/05).

Go here to get a free Obama button. Be on a mission. Be the change you wish to see in the world. Get enough to give to friends or leave in places for people to pick up. You never know.

16 comments:

  1. Oh lord, I guess I'm glad to live in California, where we don't swing so much (contrary to popular opinion suggesting the opposite), because I haven't actually seen a single ad yet. That high gas one is just insane.

    I'll be picking up my Obama button, and wearing it proudly. I just want to know who the VP will be. Not that that will change anything...meaning, it wouldn't matter who he selected, I'll still vote for him. You know, unless he chose Lieberman. Then I might stay home. ;)

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  2. My mother is hesitant about Obama because she saw people on TV saying he doesn't wear a flag pin and didn't have his hand on his heart during the playing of the national anthem. Please immediately drive over to her house and convince her to vote for Obama. Or kill her.

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  3. I'm so sick of hearing about this election! I wish it was just over! However, I like Paris Hilton's rebuttal video to McSame's.

    My friend has an Obama button with he and Michelle doing the fist-bump and the words "Together We Can". It's pretty cool :-)

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  4. Oh, well done, Nance. And all written whilst in dire pain. Kudos to you, dear.

    I am pondering the 3-second limit on a handshake. It doesn't sound like that long, but in fact I road-tested it with my watch, and frankly, any longer makes you look like you are pumping gas.

    My favorite Dept. rule is "no visible underthings of any kind ever on anyone." That is my personal pet peeve. ESPECIALLY BRA STRAPS! I don't care if women think it is some kind of fashion statement. It is NOT. Bra straps hanging out (http://tinyurl.com/5q2ool) are tacky, tacky, tacky. I am, admittedly, no fashion princess, never have been. But I know where to buy a strapless bra, and when to wear one.

    And... last but not least, I am so with you on the campaign ads. I am not so much tired of all the campaigning as I am of all the mud-slinging. Especially the sleezy stuff McSame is putting out lately. Does he think this is going to improve his image, all these cheap shots?! The worst one is the "Is he ready to lead?" Gaaaahhhh. (Here is a fun counter-attack if you haven't seen it:
    http://tinyurl.com/5qvn3e

    I'm off to get my button. ;-)

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  5. Wow Nance! What a mouthful here! I tell you what though...If I hear about Brett Favre again, I think I'm going to puke!!! I haven't tuned in on the radio lately because I'm so sick of it! I also only watch a couple seconds of the news, if that, because I'm tired of the shit!!!

    And I'll be glad when all this election stuff is over, because McCain makes me want to throw things and damage my TV just as much as Bush did!!!

    P.S. I don't know where I'd be today without Rated R movies before I was 17!!!

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  6. tera--i had a lot to say (as usual) and am not sure if this will be my last post for a while! as far as R movies, i am just really sick of seeing infants and toddlers with parents who are too clueless or too selfish to get a babysitter and naively believe that the kid will somehow NOT feel any impact from violent or sexual images eleventy hundred feet high right in front of them. Please. Plus--the guidelines are there for a reason. Don't let kids age 12 see an R movie and then wonder why they are hypersexualized or hyperviolent or get in trouble at school. DUH.

    ortizzle--head over to CNN today where the McSame campaign is calling this round of ads his "humorous" one. Somehow, I don't really find them funny. And as far as them using Moses/Charlton Heston in one online ad and the entire McSame machine referring to Obama as "The One"--why yes! Yes, he IS. The One to save this country from more of The Same. SomeOne has to. And it ain't gonna be a republican.

    jenomena--we all had Primary Fatigue with the 18-month season, too. We need a break. But as long as we all remember what we need to do in November, that's all I care about.

    mikey--sounds like your mother has been watching the Faux News network. What a sad commentary. she may be irretrievably lost. perhaps she won't vote at all, and we can at least have that.

    j.@jj.--LIEBERMAN!?!? he is campaigning heavily for McSame! he is a traitor, pure and simple. i would lay pretty heavy bets right now on Evan Bayh for vp. And that would be okay with me. i've had my eye on Bayh for a couple years now as a rising star in the Party. he's definitely one of the good guys.

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  7. Oh I wish I could get my dumbass repulican neighbor over to the Dept. to read this. But she's probably too dumb to even follow a link if I sent it in an email. *Sigh

    What do you have against the Olympics? I'm really excited about them! I even kept my eyes peeled open for all 100 hours of the opening ceremonies...which were absolutely spectacular!!!

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  8. nina--oh, i have NOTHING against the olympics. i just got way sick of the month-long hype and the silly emphasis on 8-8-08. i was awed by the opening ceremonies, and we watch whatever events are on each evening, although i've gotta ask: how the HELL did beach volleyball get to be an OLYMPIC SPORT? and why are the women's "uniforms" for it far more abbreviated than for SWIMMING events? i cannot take that very seriously. come ON.

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  9. Nance, I'm still waiting for you to tell me how you REALLY feel...(smiles)

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  10. Today I got another anti-Obama email ... this one about how he repainted his plane and removed the American flag and replaced it with his logo. It's true per Snopes. Now I know that every candidate probably repaints his plane and Obama's logo is red, white, and blue after all. No matter what, there's no point in even replying to those friggin' emails because the folks who send them have already made up their mind that they are not voting for Obama. Just like I have made up my mind I am not voting for McSame. (And, BTW, they are the same folks who send around the untrue Obama emails, so they are not interested in truth.) I did reply to one of those emails the other day ... one that compared Cindy to Michelle--with Cindy walking on water. My reply was "Sorry, but gag. What about the fact that Cindy and John got together when he was still married and she was one of many, but just happened to be the one with the most money?" As you can imagine, I got no reply to that.

    I did pass on the info on McSame's slights against educators and education to my sister, a teacher. I am sure she'll share that with others in her field. That info COULD actually change some votes.

    Love your rules as always!

    So sorry about the shoulder issue. Good luck tomorrow!!! Insurance companies suck. I was just on the phone three times in a row with mine. Had an unexpected hospitalization 10 days ago (the bill was $16K for 32 hours!) and insurance company was saying my condition did not merit in-patient care so they would not cover the stay. After going near ballistic and just about needing hospitalization again, I spoke to a supervisor and it seems like it's a matter of the hospital not providing enough info. I will be on the phone to them tomorrow.

    As far as the button, some people might go for it just because they like the looks of it. It's sad, but I honestly believe votes are made on such an arbitrary basis. Well, if it works for our greater good, then so be it!

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  11. Nancy7:01 PM

    Nance,

    The deputy Director of The Capital Spiritual Civilisation Construction Commission is wasting his considerable talent and good taste at his current position.

    Passing out tips to the people of Beijing is not what a man of his caliber should be doing.

    He should be at Vogue or Glamour explaining to those people that THEY should not wear their pajamas in public or wear white socks with black crocs or wear more than three colors at one time.THERE he could do some good!!!!!

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  12. nancy--isn't that the truth? clearly, the chinese aren't the only ones in need of a Little Red Book.

    shirley--i really think that you're right about those people passing on those stupid emails. they cannot be helped, and the ones who believe that crap are either too stupid to vote or wouldn't vote for Obama anyway.

    and I'm so sorry to hear that you've had a medical summer, too! sigh. it's bad enough to need an operation or procedure, but to have to wrangle with insurance...well, that's just doubly hideous. keep me posted, too.

    tera--oh, but i always do!

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  13. Just dropping in to say (as it is the 12th) that I hope your surgery went well, and that you are not in too much pain.

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  14. Halley2:51 AM

    Nance

    As always your are my light in all things political, if it weren't for you and Nina I would be oblivious.

    I hope you are recovering well and not feeling too bad.

    ~Halley

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  15. Nancy1:00 PM

    How you doin',Nance?

    Just dropping in to say hello and hope all is going well with you.....

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  16. nancy--things went better than we thought. thanks for thinking of me.

    halley--always glad to help with politics! i'm feeling well, thanks. so nice to see you here again.

    ortizzle--surgery turned out to be a big surprise. more on that soon. good news is that i feel well and recovery is less complicated. thank you for stopping in especially for the encouragement.

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Oh, thank you for joining the fray!

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