Thursday, October 30, 2008

Doing My Part For Consumer Confidence (And Somewhere In Here Is A Pun On Dogs)

Things have been so tense here at the Dept. lately. It's nonstop Politics--mainly because we're a Battleground State and we are inundated with ads from every media outlet, but also because it's all we talk about and our televisions are constantly tuned to CNN, MSNBC, and CNBC. It's also nonstop Economic Gloom and Doom for the same reason because those same channels watch the Dow forecast our Fiscal Armageddon even before our statements arrive in the mail. Rick and I just grind our jaws and madly press buttons on the remote, and when I can't take it anymore, I do two things: watch dog shows and go shopping!

Let me be clear--I do not own a dog, nor do I ever want to. Dogs are way worky: you have to train them, walk them, play with them, take them out even when it's cold and rainy and snowy. Forget all that. Plus, they are hairy/furry. I have finally rid my home of extraneous cat hair left by the Late Dept. Cats, Travis and Emily, and they've been gone since September '07 and July '08, respectively. In all reality, dogs are pretty much just furry toddlers who never quite grow up. Major style-crampers. Watching dog shows, however, gives me all the enjoyment of appreciating the really neat breeds without all the labor-intensive bullshit that goes along with Dog Ownership. As a result, I can identify the vast majority of AKC breeds by sight and know their proclivities and standards. And because I am a religious Dog Show Viewer, I even know some repeat entrants by name. I know, how sad.

So, I'm watching a dog show--I think it was a Eukanuba; which one it is never matters to me unless it is Cruft's or Westminster, which are the only two that really matter to anyone anyway--and I come to a few realizations about a few breeds that I just don't have any tolerance for anymore, and here they are:

*Brussels Griffon: Hideous bat-faced dog. The commentator says, "this breed is not suitable as an outdoor dog." No kidding! This dog is just too damn ugly to be taken out in public, really. I think that if the dog is in dog shows, it should at least be so ugly that it's cute, like a shar-pei. Not like this. Ugh.
*Chihuahua: I'm sorry, but these dogs are just spastic crack dogs. They're always shaky and always look like they're scared and/or hiding their stash from the cops.
*Shih-Tzu: This thing is not a dog, it's a hobby. For shut-ins. Please.

Finally, I was going to file a Viewer Protest because the winner of Best In Show was a pug named...Boo. Please. I wanted to throw up. What the hell kind of name is that for a dog? And a pug? I can think of eleventy billion better names... for any animal. IN THE WORLD.
On to shoes. Which was my shopping part.

On Sunday I decided I couldn't wait any longer to buy the Shoes I Had Been Coveting For Ages. And I really needed a Shopping Fix. I couldn't remember the last time I had bought shoes, but I think it was actually summer. So I zipped out and came back with The Shoes (on sale!), a second pair (half price!), and a purse (also half price!) in a Major Shopping Tour de Force. Allow me to share them with you now:

Holy crap, are these the cutest shoes or what? These are The Shoes I Had Been Coveting For Ages. I wore them on Wednesday with grey and black teeny-houndstooth pants and a long grey coat sweater, and it was major. The black is patent leather, including on the heel. Don't you just love styling details like that? Next up:

I got these because the second pair was automatically half off, and there was no way I was walking out of there and leaving a deal like that on the table. So I found these. I don't know if you can tell, but they are a gorgeous plum color. I have a knit dress that they will match, not to mention any number of grey and black things that these can accent nicely.

And, somehow, I was able to avoid the usual Purse Agony when, by a stroke of luck, I found the exact purse in black that I had bought in buttercup yellow for spring, thereby saving me at least six grueling hours of foraging through Handbag Hell and practicing the various moves I execute daily with my leather appendage: the one-handed wallet grab, the blind key-search, the strap-flip, the no-look lipstick rummage, etc.

Sweet victory. And at 50% off.

I really feel like I'm doing my part for the economy. My own little Stimulus Package for Ohio. When the economy gets tough, Nance goes shopping. Just not for a dog.


  1. Thanks for doing your part. With my husband out of work, we can't do our part right now. Go, buy more shoes! The economy is counting on you!

  2. Well done. I covet the first pair of shoes. (Which commandment did I just break? - I don't care.)

  3. The retro-spectator shoe boots are fab. Love the style and the grey. SAucy and understated at the same time. I would drool and weep if I saw them in a store. I so envy your ability to walk in heels (perhaps we should add the Seven Deadly Sins to the above mentioned Commandments). Alas, I have bone spurs and am so clumsy I would wind up in the e.r. if I tried something like that.

  4. sputnik--welcome back! i was starting to worry about you, having visited your blog time and time again, but still not seeing a new post there or your comments here. yes, i love the spectator look, too. these are called "speakeasy"--how cute!

    nancy in A2--covet no more. drop in at your local famous footwear or go online and score some yourself. they're still on sale. made by Connie, called "speakeasy", and they come in all black, too, but why lose all that detail in a solid color?

    j.@jj--i feel i owe it to the USA after spending our entire stimulus check (or as one of my commenters called it "Bush's Blood Money") in canada.

  5. Nance, you always keep me laughing! A dog like the "fancy" one in the picture could detract from your own shoe appeal. BTW, I like the second pair ... ooh la la, sexy! And, they were half off! Awesome! You are so right about handbag hell, too! I will keep a good purse past its prime just to avoid that nightmare.

    I'm not supporting the economy much these days, but I will be next month when I do a girlfriends' trip to Biltmore.

  6. Anonymous8:52 PM

    A pug named Boo? There really are much better names out there. I just want to point out that most clever name for a dog I've heard was for a great Dane named Hamlet.

  7. I just asked Jason last night, "What are we going to watch on TV after the election? This is all we've been watching for the past 2 years?!?!" His response, "We can finaly get rid of the cable.

  8. nina--i know. had an article up yesterday about post-election withdrawal. i avoided reading it because i felt sure it wasn't really talking about me, just the diehard political junkies...

    steve m--see, now THAT is what I'm talking about. i've said it before that i really try hard to get very literary when possible with pet names, and that one is a perfect example of a terrific opportunity left unwasted. thank you for sharing that!

    shirley--i did Biltmore with a dear friend and was incredibly impressed, especially with the view as you come over that rise and see it in the panorama of the entire estate. what an incredible home. and my favorite sexy Daniel Day-Lewis movie, "The Last of the Mohicans" had a scene shot there! (and I had a very daring adventure in the parking lot there that someday I will blog about. or did i already?)

  9. I love those shoes!!! Wow, my shoes are really boring in comparison. I have to do something about that...

  10. Anonymous3:33 PM


    I do love the shoes. Especially the first pair pictured.

    Of course, I mean the stunning little gems being worn by the DOG!

    The human shoes aren't bad either.......

  11. I've been to Biltmore twice before and thoroughly enjoyed myself, but never when it was decorated for Christmas. I didn't know LOTM was filmed at Biltmore ... I can see that though with all the open land and "old growth" forest. I did know scenes were filmed at Chimney Rock, because that was mentioned when we visited there many years ago. Thanks for sharing that info ... now when I look out at the countryside I will imagine DDL running around in his loincloth. ;)

  12. Anonymous7:34 PM

    Both shoes are so cute that it's like a sugar rush just looking at them. I envy you.

  13. Anonymous8:42 PM

    I like the plum shoes. The first pair? Looks like what a nun would wear on a date with a priest.

  14. v-grrrl--sigh. V, you are lucky i love you. LOL.

    apathy lounge--envy is a deadly sin. just go buy some! or get them online at! email me if you want the names of them.

    shirley--you're exactly correct: most of the film was shot in Asheville at Chimney Rock, but the scene where Cora and Duncan have tea and he proposes is shot in a small courtyard at Biltmore. And that gorgeous bridge that Duncan drives over on his way to "Albany" is on the grounds at Biltmore.

    nancy--I had to use a photo to bring this disparate post together, so i googled Dog Shoes. you'd be surprised how many images came up! I liked this one because it wasn't prissy.

    anali--how wonderful, a reason to shop for shoes! glad to be of help.

  15. Nance I just love how you hold your shoes on high :)

  16. tera--LOL. my shoes have become an embarrassingly big part of my identity. i have to admit it.


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