Sunday, March 02, 2008

Back In The Dating Pool

My husband and I are dating, and I highly recommend it. Dating one's husband, that is, not you dating my husband. Obviously, he's taken. We've just decided to begin going out with one another again, just like Old Times--you know, back in the Eighties. (That's the 1980s for those of you ever-so witty DoN readers who like to imagine yourselves quite the youngsters. Sigh.) Hmmm...actually, we met in 1977, so we dated in the late seventies, got married in 1981, so I guess we actually dated in both decades, but--

But I digress. The point, and I believe I do have one, is this:

It's astonishing that those Things We Used To Do are, in fact, still out there! Are you all aware of this? And, you do not have to do only one of them in a day! Even if you are no longer a teenager, it is entirely permissible to, say, go to dinner and go shopping and go to a movie ALL IN THE SAME DAY! That is a date! And you can go on one with your husband!


Listen, don't feel bad if you're sitting there totally blown away by this. I know I was when I first figured this out a few weeks ago and then broke the news to Rick that what we had been slowly doing over the past month or so was actually "dating." But once we realized it, we embraced it.

No more Saturdays spent at the grocery store and bank and quickie oil-change places for us! No longer was his weekend attire going to be old college sweatshirts and paint-spattered jeans. That life was over. As a matter of fact, Rick got so into it, he didn't even hesitate when the saleslady helped him shrug into a gorgeous Michael Kors sportsjacket. (Of course, it helped tremendously that it was on sale.) He wore it yesterday on our date. He also wore cologne, dark denim jeans with no paint splatters, and shoes that were not his work boots.

We started off on a little shoe shopping trip for me. I haven't bought shoes in ages, and I've been feeling bereft in that area. That, and the foot of snow on the ground here left me in a sort of Fashion Funk. Thankfully, there were clearance sales, and I picked up two pairs of deadly sexy shoes for less than $65 total.

The first pair is a wicked little pair of black lace-ups that plays off of the old-lady sensible shoes that your grandma used to wear a long time ago. Vivienne Westwood showed a lot of these, but these are made by, believe it or not, Aerosole. I don't know if you can see the detail or not, but they have a great stack heel and lots of stitching. Very witchy. Great with a skirt or pants.
The second pair is made by my shoe god, Franco Sarto. He can put a heel of about eleven inches on a shoe and it will still be the most comfortable shoe in the world. These are steel grey suede and very sexy. I am glad I waited this long to find my perfect pair of grey pumps because these are it.
We had to drive to two stores to find shoes that I loved at the price I would pay because I am both picky and cheap. There is also the fact that I will not buy spring shoes now with a foot of crappy snow on the ground. As we drove, we chatted and laughed and held hands and talked politics and music.

After scoring the shoes we decided to get lunch because we were going to the afternoon movie! I know! (Yes, this is the man who hates to go to movies "in the middle of the day because it always makes me tired and then it's dark when we come out and the whole day is gone.") We got a nice lunch at a restaurant where we sat down and did not use paper napkins or plastic cutlery. Then we went to see There Will Be Blood so that I could finally witness Daniel Day-Lewis's brilliant Oscar-winning performance. (And let me just say here that oh my word his performance is not only riveting but downright scary.)

During the movie I never took my coat off because it was so frikking cold in that theater. Horrid. I was freezing. And because it was the weekend and we live in Ohio where everyone eats between the hours of 5 and 7, all restaurants around us were packed to the rafters when the film let out at 6:15. Knowing that we'd have to wait forever to get seated and I'd be eating with my coat on anyway, we opted for Chinese takeout at home in the comfort of our toasty little house. In our jammies.

For those of you keeping score, that's: shopping (2 pair shoes), lunch, movie, dinner. A pretty darn good date.

Tomorrow, he's ordering concert tickets for a June date. He's really getting good at this.


  1. You're either going to love me or hate me when I say this, but that first pair of shoes screams out "Hester Prynne!" to me. I don't even know why. Scandalous?!?!

  2. Naaaaaahhhhhh.... that first pair of shoes screams out "There will be blood." Very no-nonsense, power-suit-with-trousers shoes. (Or not... my fashion sense is nonsense based on instinct.)

    Love your dating system. We have reinstated that around my house. It only happens about once a month, but when I finish grad school....

  3. What is it about movie theatres- they're always freezing!

  4. princess otu--oh, thank you! i'm glad to know it ISN'T just me.

    ortizzle--aren't they very wicked? i am plotting/planning my outfit tomorrow to maximize their look. perhaps my black pinstripe pants...

    i.h.--oh, i can see a bit of the pilgrim in there, but the stack heel makes them Sexy Puritan. that's their edge. lol. so, Hester Prynne...very apt.

  5. I love date night with the Hubbo. I think we'll go to a nice romantic flick - like There Will Be Blood.

  6. Because I jumped into marriage with two feet and a big smile 26 years ago this week, I'm now playing hard to get.

  7. You are one lucky lady! Dates with your husband! Fabulous new shoes! Wow! Don't mind me, I'll just be sitting over here being a wee bit envious of you, ok? :)

  8. Anonymous1:01 PM


    I'm disappointed! Think of all the crocs you could have gotten for $65.00.........

  9. My husband and I rediscovered dating as soon as our kids were old enough to move out and we love it. We often go to a matinee movie and an early dinner, then we have a whole evening at home in our jammies to watch MORE movies or DVR shows. Reassure your husband with this information. An afternoon movie gives you even more time in the day!!

  10. I thought for sure there would be a post about your primary tomorrow. I guess you just never know. Have fun voting!

    And the thing with Brian William's tie. Maybe he's wearing it specifically to spite you and test your creativity! Could he have read the tie report? It's fun to think about. : )

  11. Bravo for the two of you dating! I agree that a day date stretches out the pleasure. I also am a firm believer that if you have an outing on Friday evening, that also makes the weekend seem much longer and more eventful.

    I couldn't go for the first pair of shoes personally, but the main thing is how YOU feel in them. If you feel hot, you will be hot! The second pair looks wonderful, but I'd have to try out that designer to see if I agree on your comfort assessment.

    I agree on the theaters always being outrageously cold ... in the winter, you figure they are saving money on the heat, but in the summer??? It's not like they sell more food when it's cold in either season.

    Anyway, congats on rediscovering dating and all the fun that goes with it (oh, and getting to see your other man, DD-L!). It is definitely an advantage of being an empty nester!

  12. I want to rediscover dating my boyfriend! It's sad that now we live together and don't go on dates because we're both busy or tired (when we're free). I'm hoping that this spring we'll be able to make time for day-dates on Tuesdays (we work for the weekends!)

    PS--I love the daily sidebar bunnies, too cute!!

  13. Love the shoes!!! I can't wait to wear heals again, I miss then dearly!!!

    How exciting that you're dating your husband again. I get all excited when Jason takes me on a date too, especially when it's more than one thing at a time. On Saturday, we went to breakfast, went shopping and were planning on going to dinner but HE fell asleep when I begged him to take me home for a little while so I could rest. That last part kinda sucked but it was still fun!

  14. I love that day. Once in awhile, my husband and I have a day like this, and I love it. :) Glad the madness continues!

  15. Anonymous8:56 AM

    I have a pair of those witchy shoes! Comfortable AND sexy! Also...I'm right there with you on the dating your husband. I mean...MY husband. It's the only way to remember why you married in the first place. Otherwise...couples turn into their parents a lot faster. I'm just saying.

  16. Love the retro-prim (Prynne?) Aerosoles. They're hot. So was Hester. Instead of being a hypocrite, she knew her passions and followed them, and took the consequences willingly and with dignity. If only Zappos had those shoes online! (I'm a non-shopper.)

    Dating: Years ago we instated a policy of ABT (after bedtime) dinners on Saturday nights. Put the kids to bed and cook a late candlelight dinner together. One kid is too old to "put to bed" now, but he's usually out on Sat. night, so the policy continues.

  17. a.b.--"great bloggers...!" if there's not a saying that starts out like that and ends with something about taste in shoes and dating husbands, then we need to think of one.

    j.@j.--i do too. we've definitely earned it. thanks for fitting in the Dept. with everything else going on in your life these days. i'm very touched by your presence here. hope it has provided a little respite.

    nina--your fatigue is more than understandable! and your dating days are far from over--they'll just be more cherished soon. how much longer!?

    jenomena--glad you've been noticing and enjoying my bunny feature. it's not quite daily because that would be too worky, but i try to put a new one up when i post. have you checked my new link under "necessaries" so you can get a daily pic of that cute little baby polar bear?

    shirley--i know the first pair is a matter of taste, but they just give me that sort of "naughty secretary" kind of feeling, but very empowering. and do try some franco sartos. i don't know how he does it, but he does it.

    anali--i can't bitch about the media anointing frontrunners and all that, and then sort of do the same thing in my blog by endorsing candidates. everyone knows i'm a diehard dem, so i am not shy about that, but as long as states still have to vote, i haven't come out with my "pick" of the two in the race. let me just say that in the final analysis, i'd be happy with either one in the Big Chair. i did vote today in the midst of a huge ice storm. the weather here is awful. some counties are already rumored to be keeping their polls open later than 7:30 due to weather concerns. we've had trouble with voting machines in cuyahoga county. i'm hoping for a clean and uncontested election all around.

    mrs. who--i've been wondering where you've been! lol. i've also been reassuring him that we don't have to do all of our dates in one day, like this. it is lovely, though, to have a whole day of nothing but niceness.

    nancy--come over here so i can smack you. lol.

    ck--your time is coming, youngster! i paid my Kid Dues (car seats, spaghettios, Disney viddies, snowsuits, PTA, etc) and this is the reward. how many trips to the ER have you or the husband taken yet? get back to me, baby.

    v-grrrl--i know. we have a lot to talk about, you and i.

    nancy in a2--i highly recommend it. i had to remain seated in the theater after it was over for about 5 minutes, though. i simply had to get over it. literally. you know how DD-L is.

  18. Yay for dates. I loved the times when I would get my husband all to myself...even if we mostly had a difficult time coming up with something worthwhile to do. I am so glad you had a great time.

  19. An advantage I've found to dating my husband is I don't have to feel bad about how much popcorn I eat. ;) It's good that you're dating. We try to date too. Mainly afternoon dates because we would probably fall asleep in an evening movie.

    I LOVE lace up shoes like that. I don't fall down in them. I wanted to get a pair this winter because of their hotness fashion-wise but I never did. I did have a pair the LAST time they were fashionable. I should have kept them.

  20. simplypink--nice to see you back! i find that i simply cannot eat during movies. too distracting and noisy. why is it that all the food served to eat during films is so noisy?

    laura--even just the "walking around" dates are fun. moreso in warmer weather, of course. LOL.

  21. I like both pairs of shoes! You will be even more formidable in that first pair at school!

    Hubba-hubba and I are also trying to "date" a bit more. It's so good for a marriage.

  22. Anonymous9:12 PM


    I forgot to ask:

    When you got home from your fabulous date, did you let him go all the way? Just wondering.....

  23. gina--love the word "formidable."

    nancy--i never shop and tell...


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