Thank goodness for Ally Bean, who gave me something to write about. I'm not feeling particularly Thinky or Inspired lately, so I'm borrowing from her latest post in which she asks and answers some questions about herself. She chose ten from an interview that she read, and I'll see how far I get, depending upon how much I want to chat about each one. I've altered the wording of some questions to better suit my purposes. Let's go.
1. What is a character trait you most dislike in yourself?
Oh, just one? I am not as patient as I'd like. Many people are very surprised by this, especially knowing that I was a teacher for thirty years. Perhaps that's where I used it all up. I find myself always feeling impatient, as if I'm in a terrific hurry: in the car; in the checkout line; doing tasks at home. I have no idea why. I'm rarely on a schedule or deadline. Fortunately, I rarely show my impatience, so few people even know.
2. What is a character trait you most dislike in others?
Again, just one? I'd have to say Willful Ignorance. I have the hardest time with stupid people, and with stupid women especially. I get so tired of hearing about Undecided Voters in this election or people who say they don't ever watch the news because it's too depressing or people who say they don't vote because it doesn't matter anyway. I just want to light those people on fire.
3. Describe yourself in three words.
Intelligent. Kind. Concerned.
4. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
The dreaded menopot/meno belly, that little belly that won't go away now, no matter what. If I hadn't grown up with weight issues, it probably wouldn't be such A Thing with me. Thanks to so much fixation on and bullying about my weight when I was a kid, it's something that has become ingrained. Even when I was ill and my size 0 clothes hung on me, I didn't have a realistic perception of my appearance and looked for bulges. To this day, when I see my reflection or a photograph of me, I don't recognize myself; I have no real idea of what I look like. Other than that, I'm pretty happy about how I look, despite the signs of normal aging. I decided long ago that I'd age as gracefully as I could and not be a big baby about it.
5. If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
Civility and decorum in the public square. I can pinpoint exactly when rudeness and disrespect took over our Politics, and no, it wasn't when the adjudicated rapist descended his golden escalator. It was the moment when republican representative from South Carolina, Joe Wilson, shouted "You lie!" at then-President Obama during a speech to a joint session of Congress. At first, the retribution was swift and strong: both parties condemned the action; his own wife called him an idiot; he apologized. Later, however, he had a change of heart and fundraised off the moment, appealing to the worst elements of the party, a faction which has only grown stronger since then.
I'd also like to include in this what I call the Great Casualization Of America. I'm so tired of seeing people wearing pajamas and slippers in public. I hate seeing men wearing baseball caps in restaurants and anyone wearing flipflops or crocs unless they're gardening or boating or on the beach. I can only imagine what is being flipped and flopped up into my food or produce. America: where khakis are the new tuxedo. Sigh. (And longtime readers know how I feel about feet. Ugh.)
I don't want to end on a low note, and this is getting longish, so let's do one more and leave it at that.
6. Who is your celebrity crush?
Oh, we've talked about this before. Actually, I just talked about this yesterday on Football Sunday over at Sam's house, a quieter affair since Jared, Jordan, and Theo weren't there. (Theo is growing so fast that they had to take the day to go buy him warm clothes.) Not only was there an ad for the new Dylan movie starring Timothee Chalamet, but the Browns were playing, so I could gaze at Myles Garrett.
Nance: Oh, Timothee Chalamet. He's just beautiful. And he does all the singing in this film.
Rick and Sam: (no response; Rick is dozing; Sam is feeding Zydrunas some tortilla chips)
Nance: You know, I'm old enough to be his Nana. Myles Garrett's, too. (sighs) I don't care. They're just beautiful to look at.
Sam: Wait. If you could be their Nana, that means I could be...their DAD?! How could that work?
Nance: They're 27. Their moms would have had to have them at like 19 or something. It has nothing to do with you right now.
Sam: Oh. Okay.
(Poor Sam--the Browns continue to look just awful this season. He cannot handle anything else during games.)
Now it's your turn. I can't wait to hear from you in Comments.
What an interesting interview with yourself! I agree on several points, especially 2, 3, & 5. (For 3 I mean that I agree that you are Intelligent, Kind & Concerned.) I am sorry that you have some body dysmorphia. Growing up as a woman is so fraught with regard to our appearance!
ReplyDeleteI've always been impatient, and I think most people can tell. I try deep breathing sometimes.
Just yesterday I noticed that my face was looking more haggard than usual. Is it my new makeup brush (I'll use the old one tomorrow to rule that out)? Is it the 33 pounds I've recently lost? Or is it that I am a 60 year old woman who looks my age? Once I rule out the makeup brush I'll just roll with it - I mean, there's nothing really to be done short of surgery & I don't like needles so that's that. Well, and I'm not wealthy.
I think Timothee is almost TOO pretty. I looked up Myles Garrett, on the other hand, and he is Adorable. I want to squinch his cheeks. Like a grandma would. Ha!
Bug--I try deep breathing, too. And an internal dialogue that reminds me that I'm not in a hurry and I should get over myself. Actually, I keep a fairly long-running internal dialogue about a great many things.
DeleteIf you lose 33 pounds, your face will look thinner, for sure. (And if you made the effort to lose that weight, then bravo!) When I still wore makeup other than just mascara, I found that cream or liquid foundation was much less aging. I even mixed it in with my moisturizer. As far as surgery--hard no on that for me, too. Cost prohibitive and I've seen so many awful results. I'll just get old(er) and look it, thank you.
Timothee IS pretty. I do have a Thing for pretty men. The hyper-masculine man has never been my type. I like a little vulnerability there. What about your celebrity crush? I'm intrigued.
It's been a while since I had a real celebrity crush. The last one I remember is Bill Pullman from While You Were Sleeping. I don't know why - it's inexplicable. Because while I also enjoyed Independence Day, he didn't grab me quite the same way in that one. Of course, I have my athlete crushes, which I think we've discussed before. Sadly, many of them have ended up on the other end of the political spectrum from me and I can't unknow that.
DeleteBug--Sometimes, it's who the actor played, not so much the actor. I had the same response recently to Jamie Dornan in the miniseries "The Tourist". It was his character mostly and not him, per se.
DeleteAnd YES, I can't be attracted to a man whose views (on anything) I don't respect. I'm having a hard enough time with Timothee Chalamet's romance with Kylie Jenner. LOL
Thanks for the shoutout and kind words. I like your answers to the questions, they seem spot on to who I think you are. And that's encouraging to know my perceptions are the real you. I agree about Willful Ignorance, something that is everywhere anymore. I dislike it, too disingenuous for me to abide.
ReplyDeleteAlso like your answer about what to bring back. I'd forgotten about the "You lie" situation and how that guy used it as a badge of honor to get money from the gullible. I'm not keen on seeing pajamas and slippers in public either. It's one thing to hang out around your house, maybe outside on the deck even, in your pjs... but not while shopping at Kroger. Your crush is a cutie.
Ally--You're welcome. I always give credit, and I really do appreciate the help.
DeleteYou know, I watched that speech in real time, and I was absolutely aghast when that happened. I almost got on my feet, I was so outraged. I was sure that the Sargeant-at-Arms was going to go get him and eject him from the chamber, and I was outraged when he wasn't removed. It was a real tipping point.
On YouTube there's a channel that shows brief clips of life in different eras, random films of street scenes in London, NYC, etc. One thing I always notice is how much more nicely people are dressed to be out in public. Could you imagine those films now? I shudder at the very thought.
All of your answers are enjoyable to read, Nance! I can relate to the impatience, as well as to your admiration of Myles Garrett. He is a cutie!
ReplyDeleteSuzanne--Thank you. It's too bad that you're impatient, too. What has done this to us?
DeleteMyles Garrett isn't just cute, either. I read an interview with him and learned he is an avid reader, writes poetry, and is hugely interested in paleontology. He's also very involved in the community.
I looked in the mirror this morning fretting about my wrinkles, particularly in my neck area. And then I whispered "you're lucky you're old enough to have those wrinkles" and I hope that my daily affirmation that getting old is a privilege will someday sink in for me. This was a good reminder for me - we're all in the world together and aging gracefully is a privilege. I'm still going to spend a lot of money on sunscreen and lotion, though.
ReplyDeleteNGS--I like the idea of a Daily Affirmation about aging. And I still use a good moisturizer on my face and neck, too, as well as sunscreen and long sleeves year-round.
DeleteAge is only a big deal if you make it one. Do I sometimes wish I didn't Feel My Age? Of course, but everyone does. Then I remind myself of all the times my husband and I used to talk about wanting to grow old together, and hey! We're just Living The Dream.
Shockingly, I'm not surprised by any of your answers which tells me that your true personality shines through in your writing. Not shockingly, I agree with all of your answers.
ReplyDeleteGigi--Thank you for that huge compliment. Every writer wants to hear that her personality and truth is in her writing. That's the goal.
DeleteI enjoyed reading this, and your blunt honesty about yourself. I guess like most women, I dislike my weight but it seems to like me too well to leave.
ReplyDeleteWorst character trait: thinking that everyone believes and wants the best for everyone else. 73 and still so naive.
Best trait: believing the best of everyone--which can lead to disappointment, but also to acceptance that I set standards too high.
Can't think of any crushes on anyone.
G Sue--I'm unfailingly honest here (and everywhere).
DeleteYou know, I think the whole Weight Issue might finally be changing for women. Younger generations don't seem as hung up on it as we are, and for that I'm so glad. Thrilled is more like it.
Your best and worst traits are so very similar. I must admit that I'm surprised you still hold onto these in this world today. I went into teaching Believing The Best Of Everyone and got that smacked down quite quickly by some very sly teenagers. I learned to be far more discerning and less naive as a survival skill. As far as thinking that everyone wants the best for others, the behaviour during the pandemic proved that wrong for me in short order. If you can still hold onto these ideals, bravo for you. Perhaps I can join you again someday.
Menopot? Good grief. If you did not coin this perfect word, thank you for introducing me to it.
ReplyDeleteLove the post, of course. Agree, mostly, with all of it. Yes to the stubbornness, and thank you also for that. And the creative energy and personality that goes with it.
The analysis of lost civility is so, so true. And so sad. I can remember the day when a senior classroom was quiet and people worked in peace. The only place I would argue is about the stupidity. People can't help being born stupid or being raised without a real education. What I hate the most is greed. Especially the greed for power that tramples all over civility and logic and ends up, often and so tragically, in shouting and shooting.
I guess I should get back to baseball and maybe identify your eye candy.
Hugs.
Oops. football. Never did follow that. Hmm.
DeleteMary--How lovely to see you here, dear friend. I hope you've been well.
DeleteI did not coin the term Menopot, and I forget where I first heard it, but it was more than a decade ago. That there is a word for it does NOT make it any easier to live with. Sigh.
I do agree that people cannot help being born Stupid, yet there are so many channels open to illuminate them, and few barriers to said channels. I don't think most people have to wallow in their own stupidity. And I did qualify it by saying Willful Ignorance; in other words, those who choose to be stupid. They deliberately ignore the means to educate themselves. That drives me crazy. For example: I had students in my junior regular English class who would do poorly on tests all the time. A few classmates would get A's. The ones who failed would complain loudly and say, "How come they always get A's? Do they have the questions ahead of time?" I'd say, "No, they studied. I told you exactly what was going to be on the test." And they'd look at me like I was an idiot.
The example of Greed that you use is interesting. I'd use a different one, one more corporate. I don't know that Greed is at the root of all the shootings here, but if you trace it all the way back to the republican party, then I guess so.
LOL about baseball. Just do a Google Image Search of Myles Garrett. See what you think.
I am with you on the patience front, or lack thereof, I guess. I don't even have the excuse of being a teacher. I lived in New Orleans for a long time and once my flight home was delayed and I rushed to get in the line to change to a new flight and the one lady behind the counter was moving as if in a trance while I had dozens if not hundreds of people behind me in line (not in front, thank goodness) and I wanted to shout at her to hurry the f&-+ up! I know she didn't care but all of us had been waiting in the airport for hours. I have no patience for that kind of stuff.
ReplyDeleteCelebrity crush: I am partial to Brad Pitt and Eddie Vedder, even as they have aged, they still look darn good.
*canceled! Not delayed.
DeleteKyria--Oh, Brad Pitt. He hit his Golden Peak in the film Legends of the Fall. I don't even remember what that film was about; I spent the whole time looking at him and his beautiful face and hair. Seriously, what was that movie even about? Who cares. And yes, he still does look great.
DeleteI had to image search Eddie Vedder (sorry), and he's nice-looking as well. I'd definitely give him a second and third look if I saw him out and about, especially with longer hair. I have A Thing for long hair.
Now, on the Patience (or lack thereof). That situation would have cost me. I probably would have ended up with a terrific headache or neck ache (which would have led to a headache). Depending upon how close I was to her in the line, I might have even said something IN MY TEACHER VOICE. (Honestly, you'd be surprised how effective it is. I still employ it every now and then. It's like my superpower.)
Loved your self-assessment! Our 16-year-old grandson lives with us (since he was 2) and yesterday told me in Sunday School this past Sunday the teacher discussed families. This SS teacher is a fellow retired RN and seems to hold me in high regard. My 'dear sweet' grandson told her that I was terribly impatient! She was surprised so he gave her examples & then said "you don't know her like I do"!! So much for me thinking I am very patient!
ReplyDeleteYes, regarding civility. I too was horrified at Joe Wilson's loud comment and ashamed he is from my native state of S.C.
Your writings are always interesting, thought-provoking, and educational (how else would I learn what NEO meant so I could identify my location in the state to SWO).
JanL--Yikes! Outed to a Sunday School teacher. That had to hurt. LOL. I'm sure you could have said a few things to your Dear Sweet Grandson about how your patience has been tested and tried the last 14 years, but kept it to yourself. Bless you.
DeleteSouth Carolina irritates me to No End with its choice of representation. How could they have someone as wonderful as Mr. James Clyburn and then turn around and send the likes of Nancy Mace and Joe Wilson? And let's not even talk about their senators.
Thank you for your kind words regarding my writing here. I truly appreciate them. And bundle up for the winter ahead. I hear we're in for it this year!
1. What is a character trait you most dislike in yourself?
ReplyDeleteBeing over-critical of myself and short-tempered. It’s been a life-long battle, but in recent years, I have been learning to chill a bit more, lol.
2. What is a character trait you most dislike in others?
I am in complete agreement with your statement about ‘willfull ignorance.’ Especially, as you stated, in the current political climate: Intolerance, total lack of compassion for others, and believing every piece of crap you read on social media. All these folks who call themselves “Christians” and who have nothing to do with what Jesus preached.
3. Describe yourself in three words: Funny. Caring. Generous.
4. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
That it is reflected back at me in a mirror, lol. But seriously: the menopot belly is for real. My personal dislike right now is my old lady turkey neck, lol. But I would never submit to plastic surgery to cure any of these defects. No one is fooled into thinking we’re really younger than we are: they just think “Oh, she’s had surgery.” Might as well spend the money on enjoying life.
5. If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
Agree with your response completely. As for what people wear in public nowadays: during my last years of teaching, I got very weary of so many girls in my classes wearing pajamas and bedroom slippers to class during the winter. Not kidding. I could actually deal with the damn crocs, flip-flops and jeans with more holes in them than denim, but hey: the pandemic is over. You’re not home watching class on the computer.
6. Who is your celebrity crush?
My current celebrity crush is Ryan Gosling. That said, he still doesn’t compare to my childhood celebrity crush: Gregory Peck. I fell in love with those eyes and his voice when I saw the movie To Kill a Mockingbird. Still my all time fave.
P.S. - I deleted the original comment because the italics I put in code for didn't quite work out. Hopefully, this version is O.K.
Ortizzle--Dear friend, you could have left the original comment, italics and all. Were you clever enough to have copy-pasted your comment in entirety before hitting Publish, just in case? I shudder to think of all the effort wasted.
DeleteI share your habit of being overly critical of self. I think some of it has to do with Perfectionism. (I'd have redone my comment, too, if it didn't appear exactly as I had intended.) Your husband probably says, "It's FINE" to you over and over again; I know mine does. And I've gotten waaaay better over the years, like you.
I think this is so spot on: "No one is fooled into thinking we’re really younger than we are: they just think 'Oh, she’s had surgery.' " It's the same reason I refuse to start colouring my hair. No one believes that a 75- or 80-year old person still has a fully dark or blonde head of hair (I'm talking to you, Nancy Pelosi et al). Now, I understand that some women do it to feel good about themselves, and some people might say, "Why do you care, Nance? Don't judge." Of course they're right. I don't care and don't judge a person based upon that (I'm a huge fan of Nancy Pelosi). I'm saying the same thing you are: it doesn't change the fact that you are still your age. And yes, the neck. We are betrayed by our neck and our hands.
Ryan Gosling is cute in that wholesome boy sort of way. As a rule, I am not attracted to blonde men. But you definitely have me with Gregory Peck as Atticus. And that film was in black and white! I went through a brief Clark Gable period after seeing Gone with the Wind. I think mainly because Leslie Howard (who played Ashley Wilkes in the film) was so incredibly wimpy and unattractive. Another blonde! Hmmm.
Oh, I always compose first in Word because it's easier to edit there before I paste here. I accidentally forgot to put one slash mark before the "i" to close out the italics in the question line and the entire second half of the comment went into italics which looked kinda weird. Easy fix! I do worry too much about stuff like that; must be all those years I spent correcting proofs when I did editing work, lol.
DeleteAs a new reader here I enjoyed this wee window into you. I dislike rudeness/discourteousness in others particularly when it is hurtful and unkind, we are never going to get on with everyone in the world but that doesn't mean we can't try.
ReplyDeletesustainablemum--I'm so glad. And I'm glad to have you aboard.
DeleteI, too, dislike rudeness. I often bemoan the lack of Common Human Courtesy and have done so for years. It's especially awful when people are downright nasty to service people--any workers, really--who are simply doing their job. I've lived by the mantra "Kindness is my default" for a long, long time now. It's true that you never know what someone may be going through, so just be kind. As you said, we're not going to get along with everyone in the world, but that doesn't mean we can't at least try to be civil and kind to one another.
At a doc appt and when we got called back to the office, my answers seem to have disappeared . . . unless they show up a second time.
ReplyDelete1. I tend to run late and I wish i was punctual.
2. I dislike egotistical.people. Eye roll
3. Funny, focused, and caring
4. I dislike having thin hair. Its a result of undiagnosed celiac for years. I was not absorbing my nutrients.
5. I love your answer about the casualness of America and I want to steal it, but I guess I would pick some rare animal.breed. prob not a dinosaur because I have seen Jurassic Park.
6. Hugh Grant. Big fan. Notting Hill? Love him in that movie. Be still my heart.