Thursday, August 20, 2020

Don't Ever Let Anyone Tell You That Old Gas Stations Or Spelling Cannot Be Romantic


Scene opens on Rick and Nance driving home. It is blistering hot, and they are tired. Nance, perhaps unwisely, tries to lighten things up when they stop at a traffic light and, on the near corner, is the gas station you see above.

Nance:  (very serious) Rick. You must never, ever stop at that gas station.

Rick:  (tiredly) What? Oh god. That place. It's terrible. The pumps are all--

Nance:  I'm not talking about that.

Rick:  (looks at the gas station for several moments; the light changes; they drive on) Well, what then?

Nance: It's just not safe. There are (adds a meaningful pause, then says the rest in a stentorian voice) Icy Conditions. Even now, at the height of the Dog Days Of Summer, there could be sleety puddles or--

Rick:  (a little exasperated)  Geeze, Nance! And here I am, looking for misspelled words or an out-of-place apostrophe!

Nance:  I could not love you any more than I do right at this minute. You know me so well.

Rick:  (big sigh)  Yes, I do.

End Scene.

31 comments:

  1. I like to read signs, too. Not all appreciate the humor i find in some of them. I think I got started reading roadside signs when i was little, reading what I think was Mail Pouch Tobacco signs posted in a series, or was it Burma Shave?

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    1. Joared--Those serial signs were for Burma Shave. They were quite clever. I never saw them, but I've seen segments about them on TV.

      Delete
  2. That place DOES look a little sketchy. Did you notice the pumps look a little like Wall-E???

    But, I do love that your husband totally embraces your brand of crazy. LOL

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    1. Dee-Oh, it's just an extremely rural, tiny town "take it or leave it" type of place. Only one pump is in service, and I'm sure that when that one finally coughs to its end, the place will become a quickie beer and cigarette store and cease to be a gas station altogether.

      Now that you mention it, the pumps DO look like Wall-E.

      Rick has been worn down and hasn't really embraced my Crazy so much as he's a victim of Stockholm Syndrome: he's kind of started to develop an alliance with me with regard to poor spelling and grammar everywhere. He hates it, too.

      Delete
  3. I love this so much, I think we could be friends for sure lol! :)

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    1. Martha--If you appreciate this, then I'm sure you're correct!

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  4. Poor Rick! Then again, I love that you decided the sign meant Icy conditions at all times. And to be fair, that is what it looks like!

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    1. J--It's challenging to rise to my many Occasions; that's true. He does his best.

      And that sign just cracks me up. The graphic is hilarious.

      Delete
  5. aww, that's a darling love story. My grandfather owned a gas station . My uncle just shared photos of it with me. it didn't do well .

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    1. kathy b--Just another chapter in our Hallmark Channel romance.

      I hope your grandfather kept his gas station in better condition than this one.

      Delete
  6. LOL - you two!!!

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    1. Vera--Glad you got a chuckle.

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  7. Love it - but you are 100% right, a place that ALWAYS has icy conditions does not deserve to be patronized ...

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    1. Bridget--THANK YOU! ...and for so many reasons (the least of which being that they are too lazy to even cover the sign for the eight months of the year when there IS NO ICE).

      Delete
  8. That’s me, pity I no longer have a Rick to annoy with my random findings.

    On behalf of the World: Apology accepted although I must say some of us are actually beginning to doubt that. Just the other day day I saw a documentary on TV about ’TradWives’. One interviewee said she fell for Trump (the lying, cheating moron - my words) when she realised just how masculine he is. Words fail me.

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    1. Friko - MASCULINE?!?!? What the... I.... Yep, no words.

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    2. Friko--You stumped me with the term Trad'Wives. I had to google it.

      For those who are, like me, unaware of such things, it stands for Traditional Wives. From Wikipedia:

      A tradwife (short for traditional wife) is a woman who prefers to take a traditional submissive role in marriage.[1] Some may have chosen to leave careers in business or in public life to focus instead on their families and raising children.[1] They tend to agree with statements like "a woman's place is in the home".[1]

      The rest of the entry is, in a word, scary.

      Just as scary as anyone who views 45* as masculine. Spare me. His hair alone belies that statement.

      Delete
  9. That's hilarious! I love when couples know each other so well (or, yeah maybe it's just Stockholm syndrome) - but that to me is a sign of a good marriage more than if they're physically demonstrative. Mike and I definitely have those kinds of things (although ours more often involve sheep & cows instead of grammar - ha!).

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    1. Bug--It's eerie how many times we're thinking the very same thing and start talking about it. Or how often one of us knows exactly what the other needs at any moment.

      (Plenty of Cow Chatter between us, too. Mainly because of my obsession with them and the fact that Rick gets a kick out of it.)

      Delete
  10. Good one. You have his number, don't you? Married life, gotta love it at this point.

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    1. Ally--More like he has mine. I do like married life. I find it very comforting.

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  11. Loved living with someone who knew me that well. Glad you appreciate the gift.

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    1. Jean--I know you did. And I do--every single day.

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  12. I too had to read it twice looking for spelling errors. And that graphic is a scream.

    I have had my Joe Biden sign out front now for a week, and no one has stolen it. (Stealing political signs is a big deal in Hudson. That also is a sad commentary on life here.) Did you watch the DNC convention? I was surprised at how much I enjoyed the "virtual" version.The roll call of the states, with Matthew Shephard's parents, and the young man who stuttered, were highlights. Just an excellent job all around, I thought. Let's hope November comes quickly.

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    1. Elle Clancy--The graphic is hysterical. I almost want him to get gas there just because of it.

      How did you score a Biden sign? I've made a substantial donation to his campaign and I still cannot get one. When/if I do, I won't put it outside. I'll put it in my front window. Sign theft or sign vandalism is a thing here, too, sadly.

      I watched the last night. 10 PM is my bedtime IF I can stay up! The young man who VP Biden has mentored a bit for his stuttering was certainly a highlight, and I felt heartened by VP Biden's speech as well. (You know he did a great job if all the republicans are accusing the Dems of using a taped segment for it.)

      Nice to see you here again.

      Delete
  13. You two are pretty cute. Stay safe my friend.

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    1. Meredith--We like to think so. You too.

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  14. You guys are so funny-you cracked me up. Keep up the romance you two!

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    1. BB Suz--Well, thanks. And we'll certainly try. There must be lots of dilapidated buildings and out-of-place signs around.

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  15. Ha-ha! I had the exact same reaction as Rick: "And here I am, looking for misspelled words or an out-of-place apostrophe!" I spent several minutes analyzing the picture before I read the post because I was sure I must have missed some glaring grammatical or orthographic gaffe. Couldn't see the forest for the trees, lol.

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    1. Ortizzle--Hee hee! I guess I have some of you trained. Sorry to have put you through that.

      As always, nice to see you here. I hope you're enjoying some Freedom until the Onslaught begins.

      Delete

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