Friday, April 13, 2007

Spring Breakdown

It's been a sorta crummy Spring Break. The weather has been lousy: cold, windy, snowy and rainy by turns. I've retreated into a sort of Mushbrain Mode, and little by little, I have given up any semblance of adult dignity and household control. Yesterday, I didn't even get dressed and I washed my hair at 7:3o. P.M. Yeah.

Today, I knew I had hit bottom when I realized that I had been carrying on an entire dialogue in the kitchen with Jared in my Napoleon Dynamite voice. Complete with well-placed movie references. I stopped, chagrined.

Me: Oh my god. That's it. I am almost forty-eight years old and I'm doing the Napoleon Dynamite voice. This is all your fault. I won't have any friends left. No one will want to hang out with me anymore. No one.

Jared: Sure they will. Just be the one to bring the booze.


  1. Anonymous5:24 PM

    Ortizzle: So what did you wear today, Nance?

    Nance: My freakin' pajamas, what did you think?

    Ortizzle: Sweet!

    Nance: And I didn't wash my hair until 7:30 p.m.

    Ortizzle: GOSH.

  2. Anonymous6:04 PM

    12 Apr. 07 TIE: "North Carolina Tar Heels blue"??? Am I culturally deprived, or should a non N.C. resident actually know what color that is? Geez, Nance, it's O.K. to be exotic/original, but stick to the Crayola 64, O.K.? ;-)

    Anyway, the navy tie with pale indigo stripes looked rather nice, I thought, but I watched it on a 2" x 3" podcast screen, and did not have to suffer the clash of shirt stripes which were not evident at all.

  3. If you're bringing booze, you know I'll be your friend!

  4. LMAO my daughter's 11 year old friend does the best Napoleon.

    Cracks me up every time.

  5. Ortizzle--Are you really me, just on a different blog and in a different state? LOL. Great dialog.

    Ortizzle.2--I am from OH, have never even been to NC, and I still know what NC blue is. Geeze, O'tizz--would you puh-LEEZE get on the Fashion Bus? GOSH!! Actually, you cannot live in my house full of sports fanatics and not know what that color is, or not fill out a March Madness bracket. P.S.--that blue was nowhere near a shade of indigo.

    j.--yeah, yeah. i know.

    laurie--welcome to The Dept.! having said that, did you really have to rub it in that I have the humor of an 11-year-old? sigh. hurts. really hurts.

  6. Anonymous12:26 PM

    I know what color Tar Heel Blue is too, and I've never lived in NC or been into basketball. Ortizzle will have to stick with sizzling Napoleon dialogue and skip the cultural color descriptors.

    Sorry your spring break sucked. Have some 'tots, you'll feel better.

  7. Re: 4/13 Tie Report...
    Oh, DDL. Haha. I don't think I can watch that movie without consciously looking for the "faux pas" that you pointed out in class. And that bead of sweat. You know the one I'm talking about.

    Also, there is nothing wrong with hanging out in pjs and unwashed hair over break. That's the best part of break.

  8. I haven't seen the movie, so I don't know the voice, but anyday that you can stay in your PJs and relax is a good day.

    And I had a realization yesterday. I prefer reading your tie report to actually seeing Brian Williams' tie myself. You're much funnier! ; )

  9. This has been an awful Spring Break! I'm still wondering if the tulips are going to make it :(

    Did your conversation with Jared included you dancing around in worn out winter boots? Now that, I would be worried about!

    Vote for Pedro!

  10. Anonymous12:24 PM

    Oh, Nance. I just turned 48 and I would totally hang out with you. And you wouldn't even have to bring booze.

  11. Anonymous4:00 PM

    Friday the 13th tie: French vanilla and true blue were good. Even with the ubiquitous stripes.

  12. I'll always be friends with you, especially when you do the Napoleon voice! Adult dignity is overrated.

    I hope your spring break laziness was enjoyable. Only two more months until you can have an entire summer of getting dressed whenever you want.

  13. v-grrrl: this is heresy, i know, but i've never been a fan of the 'tots. too oddly-textured.

    jenomena: sigh. oh my, yes. the infamous Bead of Sweat. i still get a little thrill even just thinking about it.

    anali--i'm pleased to bring you brian's tie via my description. the fact that you don't need the actual visual is very flattering.
    i'm just waiting for the day that he features my blog on a segment of the news while wearing a killer tie.

    nina--you know it's been a heinous break if i'm actually looking forward to getting back. let's get this show on the road and get the year over and done! and no moon boots...yet! lol.

    wordgirl--oh, thanks. we could definitely share boy-family stories and much more, i'm sure.

    ortizz--you do know, don't you, that you can go full screen with the online rebroadcast? it gets a bit pixellated, but sometimes, it's worth it.

    ih--i know! 2 months is so short! and i still have To Kill a Mockingbird and Catcher in the Rye to teach yet, AND a poet-in-residence coming for a week!

  14. I am sorry your spring break was such a drag! My kids were up there spending time with my mom. They were upset that they had to bring along their winter coats, but you know kids can always make the best of any situation!

    And hey Nance...who wouldn't be your friend?! If nothing else, I am willing to bet my last dollar that you have the BEST conversations!

  15. Always friends with the booze bringers. J is a smart man.

  16. What are you gonna do today? Whatever I want! Gosh!

    You mean you didn't go make your own darn quesaDILLA or get a tow into town? Then gimme yer tots!

  17. tera--oh the winter coat burden! i'm so tired of it! and thanks for the compliment--conversation is one of my favorite pastimes, so i do try to have some fun with it.

    fringes--yeah, but i don't want to know why he knows that...!

    sputnik--lol. i see i've got some company in knowing that movie. what is it about that flick? it's so darn stupid's so darn funny! (like anyone could even know that, nance!


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