This morning was a nightmare.
Can I buy Aleve by the drum?
Anyway.
Not too long ago on our way home from working at the lakehouse, I mentioned that I was in the mood for a martini. I didn't really want to go someplace to get one, but it sounded good. Of course, we had nothing at all at home to make one. That's when my hero answered the call: we stopped at a liquor store on the way home and Rick got everything we needed to make not only martinis, but cosmopolitans, too. And The Porch Martini was born.
I cannot recommend this highly enough. Rick makes lovely dirty martinis or cosmopolitans (aka pink martinis), and we sit on the front porch relaxing, chatting, and watching the world go by. Sometimes we let the cats out and let them enjoy the porch as well. It's an unwritten rule that we cannot discuss stressful things--that would disrupt The Porch Martini Vibe. It's the ultimate relaxation for me. We each have two martinis and sometimes some snacks. I've wholeheartedly embraced The Porch Martini. (And come on--everyone looks and feels so cool even just holding those glasses.)
But even as I've embraced The Porch Martini, I've had to break up with (for now!) Peanut M & Ms. Again. This gives me no end of grief, for as you know, not only do I consider them The World's Most Perfect Food, it proves that I did NOT learn my lesson from 2023. Conveniently, however, this time I can blame Rick for my transgression. Yes, he did thoughtfully ask if I wanted anything from the kitchen. True, I did say, "I do, but I don't know what," and he brought me just the right snack, said Peanut M & Ms. He did, however, just plop a big sack of them (thoughtfully given to me on my birthday by Jordan, my daughter-in-law) on the table next to me rather than give me a little portion. After two martinis, I just kept popping them into my mouth whilst watching Netflix, and pretty soon, (like the Cheetos and Lay's Original Potato Chips before them) they turned on me. Now, I've had to ask Rick to hide them while I see other snacks, like red grapes and the pretzels that look like little checkerboards.
You know, I've just read this over, and I am a bit concerned as to what sort of example I am setting for those of you who are younger. People who buy liquor are heroes! Booze it up on your porch!
Yet, I am advocating for Snacking In Moderation. And Dealing With Your Stress. And Physical Activity In Your Advanced Years.
Really, this post is a Public Service, if you think about it.
You're welcome.
didnt you hear - 60's is the new 40's!
ReplyDeleteI am here for your rules. Absolutely sounds like better life advice than you'd get anywhere else!
RJ--I like you.
DeleteMaybe I need a shirt with that slogan on it because I don't feel like 66 in my head. We just won't talk about how old the rest of me feels sometimes.
Happy birthday! A porch martini sounds wonderful. I’m reading this while eating some gummy bears at the airport. When I bought the bag, I told myself: I will eat 10 and put that bag away. That has not happened. I am not a moderator! So I would be right there with you, going back for more peanut m&ms. My husband, on the other hand, is absolutely a moderator. He would eat something like 8 peanut m&ms and then stop eating. Oh to be a moderator!
ReplyDeleteLisa--Oh, thanks. It was a lovely day spent with my family, which was perfect.
DeleteNo, I am not a moderator if the entire bag/jar/package is in front of me. I'm great if I do it at the outset--put the snack in a small bowl or whatever--but if someone just plops that whole thing in front of me, I succumb to temptation.
I hope you had a safe and pleasant flight and that this trip is an easy one for you.
Haven’t had a martini in decades, but I was really into them years ago. A friend of mine recommended the brand Bombay Sapphire. With just “a whisper of vermouth.” And, as per James Bond, “shaken, not stirred.” Ice cold with an olive plopped in it. Don’t know if I could go for sweet snacks with a martini, but if I did, it would probably be Reese’s cups. 😂
ReplyDeleteLove your new “porch martini” ritual! Wish I could do that here, but…
(1) No backyard with a garden to gaze at from our condo balcony. Just a view of the parking lot and the community pool.
(2) We’ve had very humid weather with temps in the high 80s / low 90s for the last few weeks, so sitting outside on the balcony is not really an option. Especially with all the freaky rain storms and tornado warnings in the last week. *sigh* It would have to be living room martinis. Which is also O.K., especially while watching a decent movie on Netflix or similar. Or even our telenovelas.
As for not discussing stressful things: pretty much a survival tactic these days. Mr. O. and I have a new rule: No politics talk in the evenings.
P.S. - Happy Belated Birthday wishes! XXOO
ReplyDeleteOrtizzle--Don't hate me, but I do vodka martinis. Shaken, yes, not stirred. I do enjoy the occasional French 75, but only made with Hendrick's. That brand is more botanical and less pine-y. I sort of had to swear off gin after a really bad night of drinking it in college. Bleah.
DeleteThe sweet snacking was well after the martinis. I was a little buzzy after an insubstantial dinner, and I was craving something sweet. Those candies were a mistake. I swear I kept tasting them the whole rest of the day.
Ugh, humidity. I detest it. I'm sure Porch Martinis will give way to living room martinis once summer hits here. The long range forecast here is for a hot, rainy one. Oh joy.
I think you and Mr. O have made a smart rule, and I see Telenovela Cocktails in your future as well. We all need to do what we can to get through this.
Thanks for the birthday wishes, too. XO
No worries about vodka martinis, lol. I could never drink one because... funny coincidence... I had a very bad night of drinking vodka in college, too. Certain things you never forget...😂😂😂
DeletePublic Service? Agreed. Insert fist bump here.
ReplyDeleteDB--Got it. And hey, we all do what we can, right?
DeleteHappy, happy birthday, Nance! I don't drink martinis but maybe we should implement a porch wine night every so often around here.
ReplyDeleteGigi--Thanks! I think you and your husband should booze it up on the porch with whatever sounds good. It's truly relaxing and gives the evening a different vibe.
DeleteWell, you youngster! But boy do I understand the arthritis pain. No fun at all.
ReplyDeletePorch martinis sound absolutely divine. Wish my man was so thoughtful and clever!
G Sue--LOL! Thanks for that uplifting nickname. I'm sorry that you can empathize with me about arthritis. I wish I had inherited something else from my sweet grandmother.
DeleteNow that you know about Porch Martinis, you can simply tell your man about them and send him to the liquor store with a list. You have a lovely porch and property to look out on. Give them a try!
I’m not a fan of martinis myself, but were we to join you, Ted would have a martini (he doesn’t like his dirty, just for your reference) and I would have a glass of wine. Generally I drink white because red sometimes aggravates my sinuses, but with peanut m&ms I think it’s going to have to be red. Merlot? Cab Franc? Hmmm. Maybe a nice Syrah.
ReplyDeleteWe went to a concert on Saturday that was an all day music festival and had me standing and walking much more than I am used to. We walked about 11 miles, back and forth, back and forth, and stood while watching bands, and boy, I’m too old for that. TOO OLD.
J--I could NOT do an all day music festival like that anymore. No way. All the standing would kill me. The walking would be okay for a while, but...nope. Those days are over for me. I'm impressed that you went. Did you enjoy it? How did Dr. Ted feel the next day?
DeleteOur martinis are vodka martinis, if that makes a difference. And I have plenty of reds and whites in the cellar currently, including the varietals you mentioned. The m&ms weren't part of the porch martinis; I had those much later as a snack.
Lately, reds are giving me a migraine if I have more than a glass. I'm devastated. I'm hoping that it's a phase of some kind, that it's not the red wine as much as it's something in conjunction with the wine. White wine isn't doing it. WTF?
Happy Birthday! As far as porch martinis, I'll drink to that anytime! My capacity for gin martinis in limited, but I adore Cosmos - and I am also not embarrassed to admit that I learned about them on Sex and the City. The show may not have aged well, but it brought me to one of my favorite drinks so I'll always be grateful to it.
ReplyDeleteBirchie--Thank you. It was a lovely day full of family.
DeleteI don't drink gin martinis except for a French 75, and it has to be made with Hendrick's. I drink vodka martinis, and that's what our Porch Martinis are.
You know, I've never even seen a single episode of Sex and the City, but I do know that they had a thing for Cosmos. I don't remember when I started drinking them, but I do know that after some very stressful days at work, my son used to make them for me. He was about 8 at the time.
He's still a Very Good Boy.
Is this the wrong time to admit that I have never had a martini? I do like the idea of relaxing on the deck with an adult beverage. Also, not discussing the stressful stuff- good plan. The snacks that come back to bite- well, there are very few foods right now that do agree with me. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteErnie--Martinis are not for everyone. Oh, sure, there are lots of really lovely and fussy martinis that are extremely drinkable and full of fruit juices and flavoured vodkas and liqueurs--those can be for everyone. Those are usually ridiculously expensive at restaurants. And they're pretty! And can be dessert!
DeleteI think you, of all people, should try to incorporate a Deck Beverage Policy. Can you do a Cape Codder? A wine spritzer? And talk about anything light and breezy.
What a fun PSA! I can see you and Rick with your porch martinis looking so chic. We don't have martini glasses and feel I should get on that right away. I like the idea of eating olives from dirty martinis! Do you have those snack plates with three or four sections that can only hold so much?
ReplyDeleteHappy 66, Nance--what a nice palindrome of a number, I hope the year brings you at least double the delight. XOXO
maya--I like to think we look chic; I really do. The last thing I want is to look like two old lushes having a gossip.
DeleteWhen *I* prepare the snacks, I put out a few things on a pretty plate, nicely arranged. Rick is more...utilitarian. Let's just say that.
In a Perfect World, all martini olives would be bleu cheese stuffed olives. And jumbo size. But for home martinis, I settle for jumbo pimiento stuffed olives. And we do eat the olives. What kind of individual gets a martini and doesn't? I don't even want to know.
Thank you for your kind wishes. XXOO
I adore the concept of Porch Martinis and will have to follow your lead. We sip wine sitting out on our front patio but you're right, holding a martini glass is the height of style! Happy Birthday! 🍸
ReplyDeleteAlly--Wine glasses--with stems!--have plenty of class and elegance, too. Try a Porch Martini every now and then and see what you think.
DeleteThank you for the birthday wishes. Cheers!
The porch martini sounds amazing, except for the martini part. I could have Diet Sprite instead & still look cool, right?
ReplyDeleteWe rarely eat fried food anymore, so the fried flounder I had on Sunday (Twice! I went ahead & had my leftovers for dinner) did NOT agree with me. I was pretty miserable all day yesterday. Lesson learned! At least until the next time my dad wants to take me to the fish place.
Bug--Is your Diet Sprite in a martini glass? Or in a balloon wine glass with a couple of slices of lemon or lime? Think about its presentation, and please do not put it in one of those huge and cumbersome Stanley-esque things or, even worse, a big plastic cup. Ugh.
DeleteYes on the fried food. I couldn't tell you the last time I had anything (deep)fried. Even potato chips don't settle well anymore, and that's such a tragedy for me. At least you and I had Those Days in our past when we ate those things with reckless abandon, right?
My Diet Sprite is definitely in a fun glass (I used our wine glasses for my chicken broth for my last colonoscopy). And yes - I used to have an iron stomach & could eat ANYTHING without consequence. At least the things that really bother me now are things I shouldn't be eating anyway (for health).
DeleteNot a hard stuff drinker, but I can picture your classy layout. It would be lovely in a glossy Homes and Whatever magazine, I am sure.
ReplyDeleteJG and I do not talk about the mess much. Our election and new government are still coming off the runway, and we need to see how they start up. Yours, um, might send me to the hard stuff if it keeps up.
Elegance is all. At the moment we have a renovation going on Chez G and I am sharing my office with a stepladder and drop cloths.
Spiked coffee is a definite possibility.
Sweetie, you have no idea how young 'sixty' sound to me. My youngest grandkid was born when I was that age and she has just graduated from a four year Bachelor's program. At the appropriate age.
Mary--I am laughing at "classy layout." Oh, if only.
DeleteThe felon in the White House is, I'm sure, part of what has driven me to the hard stuff. Our state is a microcosm of DC, and it's tough to take. Like living under a constant grey cloud sometimes.
My sympathies to you during your reno. When we had the living room floor refinished, its entirety had to live in the dining room for three days. I thought I would go mad. And the noise! It was such a nightmare. But the floor is gorgeous, so it was worth it.
I understand the relative youth of the 60s to you. I'm fondly remembering my 50s! Good heavens.
The grandkid and her dad went on a holiday after she finished her exams and brought me back dark chocolate with toffee in the centre. So far I have made it last, but JG got into it at noon today. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteMary--Hey! Tell JG to get his mitts off your stash. You need to get a hiding place. I have one!
DeleteOh, I do love a good dirty martini, but it has been an age since I had one. I used to be cool, and I would go out, and stay awake past 9 pm, but those days are long gone. I am now the lady sitting at home at 5 pm in my jammies, already having had dinner and ready for a good reading or relaxing session. Actually lately I have been staying up past 10 pm (woohoo!) but when I used to work and get up at 3:30, I was firmly in bed by 9 pm!
ReplyDeleteI also love peanut M&Ms and many similar items, but I have No Self Control. I have been known to eat an entire Costco sized bag of my favorite snacks, and then of course proceed to roll around and groan a lot (or worse)! But, you know that a week or a month later I am back to doing the same thing again!
K--Wow. Even I don't put my jammies (in our house, we call them GiveUps) on until 7pm. I feel way cooler than you. LOL
DeleteWhat is it about a dirty martini? The saltiness? I don't know, but I prefer it to a regular martini every time.
You put your finger on it--it's Self Control. Normally, I have pretty good Self Control. I portion things out and put the container away. (Part of that might be because I cannot stand clutter anyplace; I like things to be neat.) But, if circumstances are slightly altered (I'm stressed, pressed for time, a little buzzed...) then other controls seem to go out the window, too. That's why I no longer can eat potato chips, Cheetos, or those soft white sugar cookies with the icing and sprinkles. And now peanut m&ms. Sigh.
At least you get right back in the saddle again! You're no quitter!
Happy belated birthday and thank you for making me laugh!
ReplyDeleteThis is a public service announcement if ever I saw one.
I do enjoy a Cosmopolitan, but you'll never find me with a dirty martini in my hand. OLIVES are the bane of my existence.
I suppose glorifying alcohol and candy isn't the best message, but those of us here, well we know you and we see what you're saying.
I love that you have a nice protocol of a few drinks and no stressful talk---that right there is worth every ounce of liquor (or calorie of candy?)
I'll save all the M & M's for you, and you can save all the Gummy Bears for me.
BB Suz--Thank you and you're welcome!
DeleteI remember your antipathy toward olives. It's sad, but I feel the same way about smoky foods and salmon. UGH. At this stage of the game, we're allowed to be picky about some things.
I can just see us, picking through trail mixes and a box of mixed chocolates, too. You can have all the mints and caramels in the latter, and all the raisins and yoghurt-covered things in the former. (And anything jellyish, no matter where it is.)
Yay! Happy birthday! I am glad to hear that you celebrated appropriately.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite snack is popcorn with peanut M&Ms. It's the perfect salty/sweet combo, if you ask me!
Engie--Thank you. My days of celebrating inappropriately are well behind me now.
DeleteThat does sound like a good snack! I have to be judicious with my popcorn intake as well. I love how it smells and the first few handfuls, but after that, it turns on me, too. So regrettable--it's really healthful.
Hi Nance! I just read your comment on Kyria's blog and I had to come right over! I look forward to reading more of your posts, and for now, I'll wish you a very happy birthday!
ReplyDeleteMG--Hi yourself! Thanks for the birthday wishes and welcome to The Dept. I look forward to hearing from you more in the future.
Delete