Right this minute, my house is so clean that I am afraid to move in it. This is what days of frigid temperatures and snow will do: force me into Domestic Activity. I even did a few things that were Not Pressing, such as:1. Polish a silver tray.
2. Finally take all of my high heels up to the spare closet.
3. Update a few pictures in the picture frames.
My fantasy basketball team is falling apart due to injury. I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that this week, no amount of research and tinkering will get me the win. My big men are all hurt; my lineups are decimated. I've decided to take the week off from the NBA. Instead, I've found all kinds of interesting things on the Interwebs as I try to forget the fact that the West Egg Gatsbys are losers.
1. I found out that Ferrero Rocher, those lovely chocolate hazelnut candy orbs, exist because the company that manufactures Nutella wanted to do something with the byproducts remaining from making their signature product.
2. Do you have a cat? Do you live in New Zealand? If you answered yes to both of these questions, you might have a problem because NZ is considering a ban on cats. An economist, Gareth Morgan, is concerned that cats there may wipe out native species of birds and rodents. He characterizes cats as "neighborhood serial killers." Sigh. In my town of 53000 residents, there are supposedly 14000 feral cats. How anyone arrived at that number (quoted once in an out-of-state publication), I have no idea. I see the same two or three stray cats every week. They drive Piper and Marlowe crazy. The only killing I've seen is when Marlowe killed a mouse from our basement. I was thrilled.
3. John Boehner said recently,"Given what we heard yesterday about the president's vision for his second term, it's pretty clear to me that he knows he can't do any of that as long as the House is controlled by Republicans. So we're expecting over the next 22 months to be the focus of this administration as they attempt to annihilate the Republican Party. And let me just tell you, I do believe that is their goal -- to just shove us into the dustbin of history." Wow. He sounds bitter and upset. But it reminds me of...what was it now? "Our top political priority over the next two years should be to deny President Obama a second term."--Mitch McConnell. I'll let My Dear Readers come up with the line for this one.
4. Does/Should anyone care whether Beyonce lip-synced the National Anthem? I didn't think so. There are other things far more worthy of our distress. Besides, if Aretha says to back off, that's good enough for me.
5. I found this quote about Aging. The fact that it came from a goofy article about what happens when hot girls get old, where they mistakenly attributed it to Hunter S. Thompson, dulls it in my esteem (if only it came from Dorothy Parker instead!), but I still like it:
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming 'WOO HOO what a ride!'"
Those who know me know that I cannot even pretend to be the "skidding in sideways" type, but I like the idea of the whole thing anyway.
6. Finally, Jared sent me this ridiculously silly viddy clip. He loves to send me Interwebs Inanity, and this one made me laugh and laugh and laugh. I hope it gets to you that way, too.
What silly/interesting/fun things do you have to talk about? And did you laugh at the viddy?
Yes I laughed - ha! I hope that he (although with that jump roping arm action maybe it's a she) knows her & she deserved a dunking.
ReplyDeleteAnd wow - nothing short of a visit from the Pope would induce me to polish silver (if I had any silver & if I were Catholic). I do vaccuum & dust for visits from non-Pope people. And sometimes just for us!
You know, I think it would be a big mistake for Obama to get rid of Republicans because then he wouldn't be left of anyone anymore. I'd have to start voting for the Green party.
No cats here, because Ted is deathly allergic. I read somewhere that outdoor cats are indeed neighborhood serial killers, and take out plenty of rodents and birds. I'm sad about the song birds, but glad about the rodents. I seem to remember, though my facts are perhaps suspect on this one, that one reason the plague spread as well as it did was because people killed the cats, because cats are of course familiars to witches, and we cannot have that. A WITCH!!! So you kill the cats, and there's no one to kill the rats, and the rats bring the fleas or whatever that brings the plague. That'll teach you to mess with witches, right? NZ should perhaps take note.
ReplyDeleteAnd that is indeed a very silly hoppy splashy video. :)
And the Bug is right...Obama needs to be right of SOMEONE, Centrist that he is.
Just when I think I can't possible hate Republicans more than I do, I read something like that which you have shared, and I find myself despising them. (My woman Hillary made mincemeat of them the other day.) This retirement gig has allowed me to alternate being slug-like and manic when it comes to my household. I like both. The video? Not so much. I would have wanted to punch that hopping idiot had he splashed me. Oh,I dumped all my silver and silver plate serving pieces but for one as polishing all of it lost its charm. Let me know when you want to meet for drinks and chat!
ReplyDeleteMake that "possibly." It seems proofing my snarky comments has escaped me! Also, I don't feel "snarky," but it surely sounds that way. Do overlook it and forgive me; maybe I do need to get out more!
ReplyDeleteDo you know I am actually married to a Republican?
ReplyDeleteBut truly, he isn't a Republican, and voted for Obama this last election.
He is horrified at what his once-grand party has become since that scumbag Reagan. Yes, I called Reagan a scumbag.
Gina--How nice to see you here again! How did we lose track of one another?
ReplyDeleteI suspect there are a lot of republicans who aren't comfortable identifying with what their party has become as of late, Colin Powell being one of the more celeb-status of the party.
And as far as Reagan, I always shake my head and chuckle in wonder at how he got to be the Saint of the gop. He was feeble, out of touch, and basically a figurehead. Sounds like another republican president I know...Angel of Death???
Bookster--I think politics makes us sound snarky, intended or not. I saw some of Hill's testimony. I never worry about her; she's too good. You and I feel the same about her in all things.
The silver tray is one I have out with a few curio pieces on it in the living room under my faux Vermeer. It had gotten terribly tarnished and still looked pretty, but because I was stuck inside, I finally got to that little item on my Do Sometime list. I have a silver casserole dish--how ridiculous--in the basement that has never seen the light of day. Got it 33 years ago as a wedding present. Stupid.
I'll email you regarding plans for a get-together. And if you watch the viddy closely, you'll see she doesn't get wet! I still think it's funny. Sigh.
j@jj--It's the whole Circle Of Life/Nature In Balance thing. You cannot eliminate an entire native species without havoc. Good call.
Same thing with Obama and the republicans! YOU ARE A GENIUS, WOMAN! You should have a blog...oh, wait! LOL LOL LOL.
Bug--I used to say I dusted only twice a year, and if it weren't for cats, I'd vacuum that often, too, I think. But wine-colored carpets and two cats mean vacuuming OFTEN. Dusting now occurs much, much more often simply because I have more time.
And I swear this house gets dusty more than a "normal," average house. It's bizarre.
I'm glad you laughed at the silly video clip. It's just so goofy. I wish I knew where he got it so that I could give credit to whomever is in the animal togs. I wonder if it was a dare.
I saw a nature documentary once that fingered squirrels (which are omnivores) as bigger bird killers than cats. They can get into the nests and eat the eggs and the babies. Anyway, Millicent Fenwick, otherwise known as Kitty, is a strictly indoor girl.
ReplyDeleteOnce I was walking Julie, the elderdog, and one of the neighborhood indoor-outdoor cats chased a hapless chipmunk directly across Julie's feet. She's the gentlest of dogs, but instinct took over and she dispatched the poor little rodent with one shake. I swear to God, that cat took up residence in our front garden and kept fixing Julie with a baleful stare through the screen porch windows. He seemed to be saying "You owe me a chipmunk."
The video reminded me of the old Sylvester the Cat cartoon where he mistakes a baby kangaroo for a giant mouse.
As to Republicans, I can only think of the nauseating Newt Gingrich chortling about a "permanent Republican majority" about twenty years ago. How's that working out for ya, Newtie?
Who are the Republicans? I don't think even they know anymore. They have turned into such a pack of pathetic, ignorant cry-babies. They cheat, lie and whore themselves all over creation, and then have the cheek to say they are the defenders of wholesome family values. When they get their way, God is smiling on this country. When they don't get their way, it's because the Democrats are the Devil Incarnate. My response to Boehner would be, "If the GOP doesn't clean up all the rubbish it is producing, its rightful place will be in the dustbin of history."
ReplyDeleteThe viddy: Sure does look to me as if that woman gets a bit of a splash, but what the heck. I am dying to know the story behind the puddle jumper. He (She?), at least, appears to be having a fabulous time. I would like to try that myself the next time it rains.
And lastly... Ferrero Rocher, a chocolate after-thought? Who knew.
Ortizzle--At least a few of the republicans are starting to get it. Wny, even Jindal was moved to say OUT LOUD, "We've got to stop being the stupid party. It's time for a new Republican Party that talks like adults. We had a number of Republicans damage the brand this year with offensive and bizarre comments. I'm here to say we've had enough of that."
ReplyDeletefauxprof--I'm glad you reminded me of your cat's name. I am going to a party tomorrow at my sister's house. She used to live in NJ and was a Millicent Fenwick fan. I want to be sure to mention it to her.
My cats are indoor cats too, if you don't count when Piper feels his chili and zips out the front door when I get the morning paper. He just scoots to the driveway and stands there while I let loose a diatribe of his shame.
And thank you for having pet names that are dignified and sane, not ones like Zippy or Bear or Twink.
*NOTICE/UPDATE* I received an email from a reader, Jill M. She wanted to know exactly who the quote in #5 belonged to, if not Hunter S. Thompson.
ReplyDeleteI don't have any idea.
I do know that Hunter S. Thompson's original quote is this: Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
I like this quote, but I like the addition of the wine and chocolate in the posted one. As I researched the quote, I found all sorts of them, each with different additions, like a martini, a glass of champagne...well, you get it. I apologize to Hunter S., but oh well. I think he'd be glad that I set the record straight.
Regarding the quote, I'd say someone along the way changed things around. But the credit for the MOOD of it all is right.
ReplyDeletehttp://news.yahoo.com/staggering-stats-cats-kill-billions-animals-162839117.html
ReplyDeleteHow timely you are. :)
J@jj--I read the article. Thank you. And it mentions NZ and the proposed ban, and recommends against it. Since the article was on Yahoo!, I had to read some of the comments. I love reading Yahoo! comments; they always make me laugh. The very first set mentioned the Plague, as you did, J., but this one blamed the entire scourge on the Catholic Church and its extermination of all cats. Then it devolved from there. The rest of the comments that I read (not all; there were over a thousand) were a mix of attempts at humor and some righteous indignation from cat lovers and cat haters alike. I am considering getting a Yahoo! identity simply to add to their comments section on various articles, if only to respond bitterly to lapses in grammar, spelling, punctuation, and logic. If only I could be paid for it, I'd be well on my way to the One Percent.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI see that you have quoted the famous Mitch McConnell statement re making Barack Obama a one term President.
Would it be snarky of me to tell you that I call Mitch "The Pigeon"?
Why? Because he shits on people unexpectedly and for no good reason...
Also,I watched the little video about 15 times and laughed every time.
Nancy--Yay! You're back in Comments. I hope it's a sign that things are good. Mitch McConnell is just awful. Every time I see him, I think of that Saturday Night Live character, Church Lady. I like your description and nickname quite a bit.
ReplyDeleteGlad you like the video. I still laugh pretty hard at it, and I've seen it dozens and dozens of times. It's just so wonderfully absurd and pointless.