Friday, July 29, 2022

When I Went Bananas And Took My BFF And Rick With Me (And A Little Politics)

 

It's back to the Bananas War with me again. Devoted readers will recall that, back in April 2021, I introduced you to my Ongoing Outrage at the price of Bananas at my funny grocery store. I continue to not only fuss about the Banana Fee, but I also faithfully text a photo of the sign (and price) to my BFF Leanne in Maryland. 

I know she appreciates these Vital Bulletins and that they enrich her life immeasurably.

Not so long ago, it pained me to have to send this message to Leanne:

(That is not, by the way, a photo of Leanne. That is a picture of her Boston terrier, Stella.) And I truly did not buy the wretched BananaS.

The following week I went to a different town so that I could shop the same store and avoid the dumb spelling of BananaS. They were still 59 cents a pound, but I took it as a win.

Soon after, Rick had a day off, and he accompanied me to the grocery store in town. He is brave and tall, so this happened:

(Sadly, I did not have a red pen, but Rick pulled down both signs--one from each side--so that I could make the necessary correction to both:  no apostrophe for plurals!) I felt victorious and overflowing  with relief. The whole world seemed somehow righted. I smiled and felt...lighter. I didn't even mind paying 59 cents a pound for BananaS.

The following week I strode confidently to the produce department. I looked up at the sign for BananaS and was rewarded tenfold. I couldn't wait to text Leanne!



Indeed. I may be retired, but I am still Out There, Defending And Promoting The Language. Teaching In The Wild, as it were. It never stops, you know. 

Until it does.

Because here's what I found the last time I went to the grocery store.


Bless her. We have a motto, Leanne and I. Everything crummy can eventually be traced back to the republicans. And she can always make me laugh.

Want to give it a try, tracing this Sign Saga back to republicans? Do you have a BananaS Story to share? Have you ever corrected a sign? Can you relate to my Pain or are you the Leanne in this story?
Or, just natter away in Comments about the Silliness Of It All.

34 comments:

  1. This series of events is hysterical and fabulous! Well, except for when they went backwards. But at least they used your modified sign, which was correct, so that was something. And oh boy, you two are not wrong about blaming everything on Republicans!

    I apologize for being MIA. Mom has had some health issues and maybe (fingers and toes crossed) we're finally coming out on the other side. I am hopeful because I want her to be well and pain free and I am very tired. I did some shopping yesterday to kill time while she was having same day surgery and I took a photo for you (well, I think there are two that you'll appreciate), which I will email to you. Please know that I'm always thinking about you even if I'm out of touch!

    xo,
    Shirley

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    1. Shirley--Dear friend, I know we are way overdue for our phone call. I, too, have been thinking of you. Things have been in flux here, and I'm just grabbing time here and there for myself when I can. I'm sorry things with your mother have been so urgent and stressful and exhausting. It's my hope as well that she's well on her way to recovery.

      Hang in there. I understand and sympathize. XO

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    2. Thank you so very much, Nance. Life seems so challenging when it's in flux. Hope you hang in there, as well, dear. I'm holding onto the "this too shall pass" line of thinking! xox

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  2. I enjoyed every minute of the banana war saga. Must remember to take a red pen with me to several emporia in my neighbourhood. I love you, Nance.

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    1. Mary--Oh, I love you, too. And please do commit Proper English In The Wild. We have to Take Learning To The Masses.

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  3. Hilarious! I can't help thinking that whoever corrected the spelling goofed on the price when they made a new sign, and when somebody noticed it, they just grabbed the old sign with the spelling errors. Money first, grammar later, lol. My pet peeves with signs in supermarkets are the classic ones of "can" vs. "canned" and "Less than 15 items." — Back to bananas: down my way, banana$ are 49 cents/lb. in Fiesta Mart (my cheapest option) and 55 cents/lb. in Whole Foods, a.k.a., Whole Paycheck. And, I discovered just recently, *one dollar EACH* in the 7-Eleven near me. Agree with the politics. The republicans are responsible for every. evil. thing. that. happens. I would love to correct mistakes on signs, but in Texas, somebody would probably shoot me for being a snowflake liberal.

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    1. Ortizzle--Your theory, while sound, is incorrect. The 49-cent bananas were a Manager's Special, a detail you could not see on the sign because it was cut off in the photo. That apostrophe was correctly placed, btw.

      My store, while it cannot correctly make Bananas plural, can use the phrase "fifteen items or fewer" on a sign above the Express Lane! I'm telling you, it's a store of surprise and conundrum.

      Here in Texas-on-Erie, where you can open carry your firearms at the fair, in bars, and everywhere but the statehouse and courthouse, I decided that the docile shoppers wouldn't take issue (or even notice) as I corrected the signage. They probably thought it was my Sovereign Right.

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    2. The use of 'fewer items' in your store almost makes up for the superfluous apostrophe in bananas, lol. I love that, and very rarely see it done correctly. —On another front, down here in Howdy Arabia, open carry in public places is also the law of the land. Last year Gov. A-butt-hole passed yet another gun law making it unnecessary to even have a license to carry. I worry not about docile shoppers, but I worry a lot about the increase in the number of nut jobs out there. And about going back to the Uni this fall where campus carry is allowed. I worry even more about all the poor little kids all over the country who are scared to go back to school. (Apologies for the digression. The Politics does have a way of creeping in everywhere these days, doesn't it?)

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    3. O--We have the same law now re: open carry. The Ohio State Fair is back after a pandemic hiatus, and fairgoers were happily told they could bring their guns. Sigh. Teachers who wish to pack heat (that was a new one in the past two years or so, I think) are no longer required to have 24 hours of training. Now, only 1 hour is sufficient. I am daily grateful that I am out of the classroom, yet fearful and sad for all my friends and colleagues who remain.

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  4. Grammar abuse and spelling homicide drive me crazy. So far I have not made any corrections.

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    1. DebraLynn--I love the potential threat of your "So far." It's only a matter of time. Pack that red pen, DebraLynn; you're almost there.

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  5. Let that be a lesson to you---never go anywhere without a red marker. I laughed out loud at your friend's and your tracing signs like that bac back to the Republicans.

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    1. Jean--It's so true. I have that red pen in my purse now, believe me.

      That chain goes something like this: thanks to republicans not sufficiently funding their No Child Left Behind mandate and the increased focus on testing, basic skills are not being taught. Students at all levels are instead being "taught to the test". Now, especially, republicans have made teaching such a perilous career due to not sponsoring/passing gun control legislation, there are not enough teachers in public education; furthermore, their focus on vouchers and equal funding for religious and private schools constantly drains resources away from public schools, making those schools severely understaffed and underfunded. This means less resources for students, which means less individualization and less focus on the remedial needs of students. These students graduate, just barely competent in all basic subjects, and go out into the service workforce.

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  6. Good for you in your crusade to uphold the Queen's English (is that right? capital E there?) I have never corrected any signage - just not qualified since I use Google grammar/spell check continuously. (I use a dash when unsure.) However, I have rearranged shelves in bookstores to cover the Pro-Trump titles. I once peeled KKK stickers off lamp posts in New Orleans. I call these my "little acts of treason." (period in or outside " ?) I wish I had paid more attention in Community College English class, but hey, I'm sure all my teachers were Republicans who were grooming us for a life of illiteracy. Keep up the good fight.

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    1. Eileen--I love your little Acts Of Treason! I do the same thing.

      English is always capitalized since it comes from the proper noun England. Punctuation is almost always inside quotation marks. I play fast and loose with that rule myself because I hate the way it looks sometimes (same reason I capitalize all the words in titles I create).

      And hey, I see what you did there. Damn republicans (I never capitalize that party; they don't deserve it).

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  7. This is just way too funny (though also sad...both the price and the fact that an apostrophe was ued in the first place). I need to find a red marker to put in my purse...just in case....

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    1. Vera--I knew it! I knew Bananas were too expensive here! You're probably paying 39 cents a pound. Lucky!

      I'm happy to recruit another Defender Of The Language. Pack that red pen proudly.

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    2. I have not looked at the price at the regular stores (horror!!), but at Trader Joe's they are 19 cents per banana. I only ever buy one at a time (we don't eat that many), so that works for me.

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  8. Good work, Nance! I used to carry whiteout (which is actually called Wite-Out, ugh) when I went to the local grocery store to fix the multitude of extraneous apostrophes. One day I noticed the butcher was looking at me and when he saw me looking at him he gave me thumbs up! Evidently he didn't make the signs...

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    1. kayT--WiteOut is only one of the many terrible product names that makes me shudder. I get that they are being clever (WitingOut the H), but it's so egregious. I love your idea; it makes things much less jarring. I may steal it although it does not Educate as much as my method does.

      Kudos to that butcher and bless his heart. Imagine his pain every day until you worked your white out magic.

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  9. I think it might be a stretttttcccchhhh to blame the price and poor grammar on a political party, but the Sign Saga is hilarious. I still think of you each time I purchase my 'nanas! So, thanks for that. 😜

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    1. BB Suz--I think you need to read my reply to Misadventures of Widowhood/Jean, above. Just saying.

      I love, love, LOVE that you think of me! Even if it's when you buy Bananas. I think of you whenever I see butterflies, which seems nicer, but who cares? In this case it's truly The Thought That Counts!

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  10. That's great, Nance! That got me looking at your old post which led me down the rabbit hole of the broccoli casserole YouTube video. Gosh that guy is so funny!

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    1. Ellen--It's so good to see you here again. I did the same thing you did when I went looking for my previous Banana post--clicked that link and enjoyed laughing at it all over again (twice!). It always feels so good to have a laugh, doesn't it?

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  11. That is hilarious! The only time I've done something similar was when I found a typo on the website for Tudor's Biscuit World & sent them a message - it was fixed the next time I checked. I don't think I even took a picture. What the heck.

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    1. Bug--I believe you even without proof. Thanks for defending The Language. I won't ask why you were on a site called Tudor's Biscuit World since you didn't tell us. ;-)

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  12. I love this, and I'm kinda glad your sign survived. I just bought bananaS today, and paid 0.89/lb. California is so expensive. Though I am sure my brother pays more in Alaska.

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    1. J--Eighty-nine cents is robbery for bananaS. If they ever get that high here, I will have to rethink my lunch of choice (oatmeal, banana, peanut butter).

      Aren't we down to only one variety of banana now because of a blight or virus that wiped out all the others? I think I remember reading about how scientists/botanists are concerned that if this variety gets a disease, bananaS will merely cease to exist. Imagine! (And then Leanne and I will have nothing to talk about. LOL)

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  13. Hilarious! How much do you want to bet that a lot of people, if they noticed what had been written, had no idea what you meant by "apostrophes" and/or "plurals?"

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    1. Bridget--My thought exactly when I wrote it. It's obvious that the produce manger or staff doesn't give a damn, or at least enough to make a new sign.

      But other than standing there and teaching a lesson, that was about all I could do. It made me feel better, and that was enough!

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  14. This is me when the local (and national) broadcasters say someone was "busted" or they use "revert back." I shake my old lady fist at the tv. Drives me insane.

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    1. Elle--Yes! The local news presenters here also use Busted to mean Broken, as in "Police arrived to find the window busted." Honestly, do they not hear themselves? So much for professional journalism (or any appearance of it).

      I'm leaving shortly for the grocery store. I'm almost afraid of what I'll find. LOL

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  15. Your analysis of how Repubs are responsible for the bananas problem makes sense to me. I’ve never corrected sign errors but have enjoyed laughing at the ridiculous mistakes on too many of them.

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    1. Joared--Doesn't it? I mean it--all Bad Stuff is inherently their fault.

      I can sometimes laugh at the errors on signs. It depends upon my mood. More often, I grieve for humanity. By the way, I went to the grocery store yesterday, and my corrected sign was still there. I think I'm going to consider it a Win now--it's a Learning Tool for the masses. ;-)

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Oh, thank you for joining the fray!

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