Thursday, October 26, 2017

In Which I Worry That I'm A Deadhead--And Not The Fun Tie-Dye, Jerry Garcia Kind--But List Myself Out Of It (With A Bonus Amish Story Included!)

It's been so very long since I wrote anything that I'm just going to open up my head and see what falls out. I'm worried, actually, that there's Nothing In There, just my bleached skull and a powdery residue from what used to be my brain. Oh, October--you and I both have had a hard time Getting With It. We ran hot, then cold; we were sunny, then gloomy, and just when we thought we had it all together, everything would change again. Who said "The only constant is change"? Someone far wiser than I.

Let's see if we can't catch up a bit with some Lists.

Happy Stuff I Did

1. Went on a jaunt to Niagara-on-the-Lake
2. Got a really good haircut
3. Bought some new fall/winter clothes

Rick and I went back for our usual Fall getaway to NotL, restocked our wine cellar, and this time met up with friends from Detroit who we hadn't seen for a couple of years. We went to our favourite winery (where I always propose to the winemaker) and had an extensive tasting of wines not even on the list. The winemaker/owner's daughter pulled bottles out of the library cellar and we tasted those, and she was kind enough to send a couple home with us. Our weekend ended with us well supplied for the winter and, if necessary, spring.

Productive Stuff I Did

1. Finished the Endless Knitting Project
2. Made a final batch of pesto
3. Got my grandmother's cushion repaired

I had been working on a bigass shawl for months. It wasn't intricate or difficult, but I just wasn't feeling the Knitting Urge, and when I was, the muscle aches and bone aches made it difficult once my Vitamin D levels crashed again. Finally, I got so sick of looking at it--The Object Of My Ongoing Failure--that I swore I'd power through it if it killed me. I did and it didn't.

The repair of my grandmother's cushion is another Amish story, if you can handle yet another one. My grandmother was an accomplished seamstress and made coats, purses, all her clothes, my grandfather's ties; you name it, she made it. She also made leather patchwork cushions, and she made each of her eleventy thousand grand- and great-grandkids one. I got mine when I went away to college. At some point, a thread or two pulled loose, and it started to break apart at the seams a few years ago. Since it is a precious heirloom with significant sentimental value, I was at a loss as to what to do and how to get it fixed. And it is thick, onerous leather, making it a difficult repair for the casual seamstress. Luckily, a scion of the Amish family near the lakehouse recently opened up a canvas-making and upholstery shop. I took the cushion there to see if he could help. Rick and I walked in and a young, bearded man in the traditional blue shirt with no buttons came out to meet us. Nearby on a bench was his straw hat. I couldn't see a single machine in the shop, but it was a bit gloomy, and of course, there were no electric lights. I showed the cushion to him, explaining its story briefly as he turned it over carefully in his hands. "It's very old," I said. "I know it's worn in places, but it's only coming apart at the patchwork seams. It's special to me, so I hope you can fix it." He turned it over again, looked at it, squinted, smiled and said, "It's old-fashioned, that's for sure." And at that very moment, surrounded by huge neon lights, the word IRONY appeared on a gossamer banner held by the staff of The New Yorker magazine. 

Finally,

Stuff In General

1. I want to post more often; it's hard to get an idea I want to write about.
2. I am very active in The Resistance; I make phone calls and write emails to Congresspeople every single day. You can too!  Email me if you want any info.
3. I'm watching The Good Doctor on ABC and slowly loving it.
4. Hooray for boots and leggings weather.
5. The post header illustration is a sculpture by Taiji Taomote. Learn more about it and this talented artist here.

**

I guess there was something in there after all among the bones and dust and detritus.  Like my grandmother's pillow, for much of October I felt old, worn, and like I was coming apart at the seams.  How has October been for you?  Any Stuff of your own to add?  And, as always, we can chat up my Stuff, too, in Comments.




24 comments:

  1. I'm so glad you could get your leather pill fixed. I'm so jealous of all your interactions with the Amish. But I must say...even when you decide to just write and see what falls out of your head, you still are very organized and orderly about it.

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    1. Jean--I'm glad, too. My grandmother would have been irked had she known it was not Being Useful all this time.

      As far as being orderly and organized spontaneously (ha ha), you know what it's like. Once you start writing, the thing begins to take shape almost on its own. Writers think like writers about writing--and it goes on from there.

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  2. Your title is a reminder of the recent discovery that I find the Grateful Dead channel on Sirius radio fairly comforting. Despite growing up in the Bay Area, in the same county where many of the bands lived and hung out, I have never been a real Dead Head, I have a few albums, a few songs I like, never been fanatical. But now I find it stress reducing, particularly the long concert jam sessions which used to bore me. What do it mean?

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    1. Silliyak--I'm not too sure! I always find live concert music on the radio to be irritating and boring. ESPECIALLY drum solos, endless jam-type interludes, and all the audience participation. It's too cacophanous and, as you say, boring. But if it now works for you, what a lucky find!

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    2. Never enjoyed drum solos, even went to HS with a drummer that went on to play with many big names and has quite a rep himself. Watched the Netflix "beware Mr Baker". Obsession with rhythm is not something I possess.

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  3. I enjoy your Amish stories. These one in particular is delightful. Made me smile.

    I've had an uninspiring October and feel rather rundown. I've been posting more often, but instead of finding the experience invigorating I've found it taxing. This is odd for me, longtime blogger and wordsmith. I think, putting into your terms, I need more Happy Stuff and less Productive Stuff in my life. Only one person can make that happen, eh?

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    1. Ally Bean--Thank you. Glad always to make you smile.

      I noticed--with a certain amount of Envy--how you've been posting like a real trouper. Like it's your new vocation! I kept thinking, "Why can't I just sit down each day and put up a post? I have ALL DAY." At least I know I'm not the only person who is finding writing to be Taxing lately.

      Best of luck in your search for Happy Stuff. Sometimes, I find that Being Productive is a good substitute for me, in that at least I can look back and see that Things Got Done. That is often its own form of Happiness.

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  4. I really enjoyed this post - a little bit of everything, and all of it interesting. I'm glad you were able to get the cushion repaired, because that's something you actually want to keep for as long as possible.

    October really didn't have its act together much this year. Not that I did either, but usually October is in much better shape!

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    1. Bridget--I'm happy that you liked the post.

      Probably I could have made an entire post out of several individual pieces, but oh well! too late now. Perhaps that will be the key to future success: write shorter posts more often. We'll see.

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  5. I've been uninspired by the blogging lately. Like the last couple of years. Maybe I should give it up. I don't know. I think I may try NaBloPoMo, and see if the challange to post every day in November gets me going or not. They have a website with prompts, which may be helpful. Or I might try an alphabet theme, and see if that triggers any brain matter.

    I remember for awhile you were having trouble getting motivated to read. Well, I am currently there, and it's a strange place to be. I have two books, one given to me by a blog friend (the author of the book, who thought I might enjoy it), one given to me by Maya, that I want to read. I have one waiting for me at the library that I need to pick up. One that is a library book, but my Aunt checked it out. We both like the author, so she pays attention and gets the books when they come out, tears through it, and then gives it to me. So the library books have a deadline. I'm hoping that will motivate me a bit.

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    1. J@jj--You know, I really, really want to write. I do. I am so hampered by my Perfectionist Complex that it makes it difficult. As I have so often said before, I Am A Project.

      I am still having problems reading, and it is often the Getting Started Issue. I recently reread the very funny, very lighthearted book Walking across Egypt by Clyde Edgerton. I barely remembered it! True, I had read it long, long ago (probably 15 years ago or more), but honestly, very little of it was familiar. Anyway, no problem reading right along, but once it was done...so was I. Sigh. I need, perhaps, a big epic to keep me going. Maybe time to reread Pillars of the Earth. I don't want to read any of the sequels after the first few--the later time periods don't interest me.

      Good luck and let me know how it goes. XO

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  6. I forgot to mention the Dead Head connection. I'm not a fan of their music, but I still have a connection in that my mom dated their lyricist for awhile in 1962-1963, before they were the Dead. He is my brother's father. He was big into drugs, and when my mom learned she was pregnant, decided she didn't want her child to be raised around that, so broke it off. They do not have much contact, though my brother did write him an email when our mom died, and he did write back and say how sorry he was. He wasn't around in our childhood, just like my dad wasn't (for my mom's own reasons regarding men, etc) and unlike me, he and my brother have not met and formed a relationship. It's depressing, though of course not new. I count not having our fathers at all involved in our childhoods as my mom's biggest failure as a parent, though her motivations were in the right place. Life is complicated.

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    1. J@jj--Honestly, if you or you and your brother don't write a memoir, it is a Terrible Missed Opportunity. Seriously. And I renew my offer of assistance, in any writerly/editing capacity you might wish.

      That your singularly interesting mother did not do so is already such a shame.

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  7. I love the Amish story - Irony indeed!

    October has felt like a month of rebirth for me - I'm consistently walking 10,000 steps per day & doing some of that on our very hilly street. It feels so good to be able to walk again without pain. Now I just need to get my lungs used to all this activity!

    The weather is another matter. It has mostly been beautiful, but every time I try to wear some fall-type item I end up having a sweat fest. Ugh.

    I'd like to write more often as well. And I do have things bubbling inside my head, but I haven't figured out how to make the words come to the tips of my fingers & onto the computer screen. Maybe I'll check out NaBloPoMo too.

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    1. Bug--When the Irony is so perfect and not dismaying, it has to be celebrated.

      The fall here in NEO is suffering from a very hot and dry September and October. Most leaves just dried up brown and fell that way. Not much color, and only recently have we been able to really drag out our autumnal wardrobes. Today--Saturday--we are actually getting a rain/snow mix. Ugh. As Jared would say, "It's Clevelanding outside like crazy."

      I'm so so SO happy for your magnificent progress after your corrective surgery! You really are having a rebirth. Keep up the good work with your activity and enjoy being more active and alive. I am following your every step.

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  8. I am so very glad that October is almost over. This past month and a half have been extremely stressful.

    Did I tell you that my son left the #7 ranked high school in California to attend #312?

    Loooong story with that one, let me tell you.

    Then, when he was getting a check up to participate in high school sports, they diagnosed him with scoliosis. For someone who wanted to go into the military, that is bad news.

    It has been difficult for me to adjust to my new work schedule. I need to work 30 hours a week, but of course I don't get health benefits. I do get retirement benefits, which I guess is better than nothing.
    One of my busiest months is coming up and I am dreading it. We need the money, so I am stuck for now.

    The only bright spot has been my daughter, who is thriving under a teacher that adores her. Thank god, as the last one was someone whom I am so bitter at. She made my child think that she did not like her, and that, as a first grade teacher, is unforgivable in my book.

    I am sorry that you are still in recovery mode. I wish you the best. And I second Julie and/or her brother writing a book. Her mother was a remarkable woman that I was lucky enough to know briefly through her blog.

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    1. Gina--I'm sorry that you have had a difficult month, especially if it meant setbacks with your son. I know that you were initially so happy to have gotten him into a school which would have made him happier with an eye toward his talents and desires. As you say, balancing that with the success of your daughter in school with an encouraging teacher is a positive. I still remember with a great deal of affection and admiration my own first grade teacher, Miss Telloni. I love her still.

      Please know that you can email me anytime. I wish we lived closer. My wine cellar would be happily at your (therapeutic) disposal. XO

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  9. I am so sorry about your month but look how much you actually had to say! Good deal about the cushion, I hope this young man does a wonderful job. Feel better my friend.

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    1. Meredith--Thank you for the Well Wishes.

      I picked up the cushion, and it is beautifully repaired. Only 5$ for the job. Lovely to see you back here in Comments.

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  10. Love your blog; so glad I found it. Your son's comment about Cleveland weather is spot on!

    My son bears a striking resemblance to the young man who stars in The Good Doctor. And by striking I mean downright eerie; everyone and their grandmother has something to say about it. I had to take a picture of the billboards that are all over Cleveland now promoting the t.v. show and send it to Connor. It drives him nuts, but I tell him there are worse things in life than to resemble a t.v. star...

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    1. Elle Clancy--I am so happy to be found and loved! Our whole family are big Cleveland supporters...of everything but its weather. Cleveland Weather--slogan "Why do we live here?" Sigh.

      We have a Freddie Highmore billboard very near us. The show is really doing a ton of promotion! Connor should be thankful that he's getting noticed for this and not for Highmore's work in "Bates Motel." ;-)

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    2. So true! But too late…everyone gave Connor the devil about Bates Motel also. (He really, really looks like F.H.) Connor was so glad when that show ended!

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  11. Enjoyed your cushion tale. List living — that’s an interesting concept — divided between happy and productive tasks. Sorry to read fall this year had little leaf color ‘cause that was my favorite season there. Does that mean you didn’t even have my especially prized Indian Summer about which I wrote? Maybe next year.

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    1. joared--We have had such a mixed-up Autumn here. We've had several frosts and at least one hard freeze, but no true Indian Summer, which I understand is a hot/warm spell after a killing frost. Nope, just rain, gloom, a bit of snow/sleet, a bit of sun...you get the idea. Lots of Clevelanding.

      We still have plenty of trees with green leaves, a few showing red, and some already bare. It's odd. We are all waiting with trepidation for what Winter will bring, especially since no single forecast as to its severity has agreed with another.

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