On The Road Again: Sexy Ice Cream, Sexy House, And Hillbilly Stonehenge. You're Welcome
On Saturday Rick indulged me and took me out for a Ride. We didn't have any real destination in particular, which is my favourite kind of Ride. It was 97 degrees outside--NEO's typical September Summer Blast--and I just wanted to get out of the house and Drive Around awhile and see what I could see. Deep below my whimsy ran the insidious undercurrent of A Hidden Agenda: Mitchell's Homemade Ice Cream. We ended up there after a time, and I was richly rewarded with a scoop each of lemon blackberry sorbet and rhubarb chevre frozen yogurt. Rick had two scoops of caramel sea salt ice cream.
Needless to say, it was all downhill after that. Case in point:
Along the road (some road, who knows which or where, really) I saw what looked like a spare, dilapidated, faux colonial made of cardboard residing behind gargantuan hunks of sandstone, in picket-like formation. It was astounding and absurd. Immediately, I turned to Rick.
Me: (assuming he had seen it) Wow. They have some big rocks. Rick: (cringing and grinning) Um...what? Who? Me: No, really. Back there. That horrifying house. Didn't you see the big rocks in their yard? It was like Stonehenge. Rick: No, I didn't. Me: Well, they were huge. And really, it was completely ridiculous. Enormous pieces of sandstone, all along, in front of their house. Entirely out of proportion and character. They needed to be taller or the house needed to be shorter. The house was a dump. A hillbilly haven. You really should turn around and go back and look at it. Rick: I'm not going to do that. Me: It was hideous. I cannot imagine what possessed them to put those in their yard. It was unbelievable. I'm...I'm...I'm just done talking about it. Rick: Thank God.
Second case, and this one was in our downtown area. This mystifying sign caught my eye immediately, and I made Rick circle back and sit through two traffic lights so that I could get a picture. If I had not already had my Orgasmic Ice Cream, I would have needed it for a reward after seeing this:
SEXY HOUSE 4 SALE ONLY !
And then, inexplicably, in the lower right hand corner, is the picture of a... German Shepherd. (Oh, do click to enlarge.)
Which, for those of you scoring at home, is a DOG. Which may or may not be sexy, for sale, only, or named "House."