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Saturday, May 14, 2011

Saturday At Home: Some Gaming And Minimal Violence

Scene opens in living room. Rick is sitting on  the couch, in Cable Television Coma, watching a reality television show in which various drunken southerners are hauled into a drunk tank and then before a judge.  Nance is sitting in her bigass leather easy chair, playing Snood and waiting for her rhubarb crisp to be done in the oven.

Announcer's Voice:  (from television commercial)...some of the finest power punchers from the MMA ever assembled!
Nance:  As soon as I retire, I have to begin a strict training regimen, you know, because that's what I'm going to pursue as my second career.
Rick:  What?  The MMA?
Nance:  Well, yes.  As a power puncher, though.  At first, I thought I would be a submission fighter, but then I thought, "Well, hey.  After thirty years in public education, you know, Been There, Done That." 
Rick:  I hear you.
Nance:  I mean, teaching is nothing but endurance and beating them into submission.  Now, I want the quick hit.  The One-Off-And-It's-Over.  You know?
Rick:  Hey, I support you no matter what.  You know that.
Nance:  Good to know.

End scene.

8 comments:

  1. Ha! I love your conversations. I have a blog friend who used to do MMA until she blew something out (knee, back?). I would approach such a career change with caution :)

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  2. Ah, reality. You leave me laughing. And here I thought you said tanning regimen.

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  3. Thinking hard about this. My own impulse has always been to get the hell out of the ring.
    Right?
    And why is my word identification 'puble', I ask.

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  4. Mary G.--Oh, believe me, if I could get out of the ring right now, I would. This has been a bitch of a year. And I have zero control over the CV.

    Maggie--LOL. Tanning! Not much of a regimen to that in NEO, believe you me. We may not ever see the sun in these parts again.

    The Bug--You have a female friend already in MMA? Well, that's it, then! I'm not even considering it. I'll find something else.

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  5. And how was the rhubarb crisp? ; )

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  6. Lisa--It was pretty good. I added a little too much flour to the rhubarb; I wanted it to be more "runny". Sigh. That's what happens when you don't use a recipe, as you well know. But it was still nicely flavoured.

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  7. Nance,

    I think you have something here...

    Don't we all agree that the selection process for a republican candidate to oppose President Obama in 2012 will be boring and cause a great deal of ennui? Yes? So let's see, how can be make this a little more entertaining?

    How about a submission wrestling match between the hopefuls?

    Top seeded Newt Gingrich would have to fight Tim Pawlenty and the winner of that round would go up against Mitt Romney. Rick Santorum and John McCain would still be bickering about the "Enhanced Interrogation" question and would skip the initial rounds but would meet later at the Wide World of Sports Submission wrestling venue where the ultimate candidate would be chosen from whoever was still alive and foolish enough to go up against the "Flyin Hawaiian" Obama.

    I love this idea!

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  8. nancy--i love it too. i even like your initial matchups and, if the republican field isn't set yet and the two shrews get in, i say let's put them together in an estrogen-filled, strident, low-wattage slugfest. i like the way you think!

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Oh, thank you for joining the fray!

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